June 30, 2009

Epic Photo: Is that Bruce Willis?

Let's see Jack Bauer do this crap.

A local construction worker, suspended from a crane, rescues a woman who fell into the Des Moines River near the Center Street Dam in downtown Des Moines, Iowa Tuesday. A man in his 50s found floating downriver from the scene was pronounced dead. (AP Photo/The Des Moines Register, Mary Chind)

Saw this on Huckleberries, the greatest blog of the face of the planet.

Get out there and VOTE!


Tonight is the night. Get your votes in!

For what?

Well, for the new mascot of College of William & Mary of course!

Yes, voting on a new mascot has been underway since April and tonight is the final night to get your thoughts in! Here's what they say:

We have Tribe Pride in abundance and are searching for a mascot.

The Mascot Committee will encourage and review mascot ideas submitted by the broader William & Mary community. We will keep you informed about our work and offer several ways for you to participate in the effort to name a mascot.

News has been reported of some of the better mascot suggestions, including Asparagus and Maze (as in corn).

According to SI.com, here's why the school needed to get rid of the current mascot:

William & Mary for decades was known as the Indians, but the school changed its nickname to Tribe in the 1980s.

The NCAA ruled in 2006 that the college could keep the Tribe nickname but its feathered logo was demeaning to Native Americans and had to go.

The school's athletic teams will still be called the Tribe, but the college wants a mascot that may -- or may not -- match the nickname.

Yes, that is the offensive logo in the corner. I know. Dang that is terrible (sense the sarcasm. Go on. It's on there pretty thick) Well, now its time for the Just South of North mascot suggestions for the school. Here we go:

1. Dancing Squirrels: JustSON and squirrels go hand in hand.

2. Fighting Tree Frogs: Tree frogs rule almost as much as squirrels.

3. The Rocks: Yes, like a boulder.

4. Spokies!: You even have to have the "!" Imagine a Spokie dancing on the sidelines during games.

5. The Northern Rangers: Brandon and I once had a short (very very short) tryout with the EWU danceteam. I'm sure we could make a comeback.

6. Youppi: He used to work for the Expos, now he has a job with the Canadians, why not switch to college.

7. The Mimes: Hilarious. And you always have halftime entertainment. Not very good mind you, but remember it is William & Mary.

8. Where The Hell Is Matt: That guy has been everywhere. Better yet that guy has danced everywhere. Why not add the gym at William & Mary?

9. Cow Pies: Don't tread on us.

10. The Melting Ice: Puddles cover the court. Opposing teams slip. Victory.

Epic Video: Spokane Shock Bobbleheads



What Spokane Shock Bobblehead would you buy?

The Northwest stinks when it comes to food

I love the Northwest. It's the perfect place for me to backpack around in my sandals and talk about how great soccer is and how we need universal healthcare. There's also plenty of Brazilian flute bands and Canadians to give the area a fully-rounded feel to it.

However, when it comes to food, what does the Northwest have? Consider the following regional food designations...

Northeast - Clam Chowder and Dunkin Donuts
South - Everything fried and bad for you
Midwest - Pretty much anything BBQ or involving beer.
Northwest - ??? Starbucks?
The rest of the West - Carl's Jr.

You see the regional crises that we're having? What is the Northwest known for? One guess would be apples, but those are grown and you actually don't do any "cooking" so to speak of.

What does that leave us with?

There's some wineries along the Columbia, making us a bunch of snobs. There's potatoes in Idaho which means we are pretty good in the minds of the Irish. There are goats cows in Montana, but they don't use them for cooking (eww) and there's seafood along the coast, but it's not as well known as seafood from Maine and Alaska (where the crabs are on roids).

It's so depressing, I may just go to McDonalds.

Could they stop screaming in tennis?

They're talking on Colin Cowherd this morning about the "noises" that woman tennis players make during matches. They've certainly been more animated in recent years and it's gotten so bad that even former tennis great Chris Evert is voicing her distaste.

"Grunting is one thing but the shrill sound that you hear with players nowadays, and especially they get louder when they hit a winner, that's the thing that I observe as a player.” Evert went on, “It is distracting when you are hearing this and I think the grunts are getting louder and more shrill now with the current players. The next time you watch say a Maria Sharapova -- the grunting is consistent but all of a sudden when she has a set up to hit a winner. I don't understand, they say you've got to blow air out when you hit the ball. Steffi Graf hit the ball a ton and she didn't grunt. There were a lot of players, hard-hitting players, and you never heard a peep out of them.”

While grunting or audible noises are nothing new to sports, listen to one sound clip of a women's tennis match and you'll understand what everyone is talking about. Not only is it annoying but it's borderline ridiculous. Evert is completely right, and these athletes need to realize that there's a line between grunting and going overboard.

Think about it, when somebody brings up women's tennis (and that happens a lot, wink wink) - the first thing that gets mentioned is the shrieking/screaming/bedroom noises that the players make.

Is this really how you want your sport marketed?

Reasons why you're still single... that baseball fan

They've repeated the following...

"A baseball game is actually 10 innings, see it's marked right there on the scoreboard."

"You know I really think the Washington Nationals have a change this year, if they get the right production out of their bullpen the possibilities are endless."

"So when do they get to kick a field goal?"

"Man, the mascot loves it when I punch it in the groin section!"

"Does my Yankee hat go well with my Tampa Bay jersey?"

"You know if I were the manager, I wouldn't have turned the double play there..."

"I love the Macarena!"

Sigh...

How to know if the restaurant you're at is cheap

Apparently IHOP has started to charge 50 cents for a cup of water, signaling the downfall of human civilization.

Here are more signs that the restaurant you're eating at is cheap as hell.

1. That napkin dispenser requires a quarter before you can use them.

2. Your french toast is served on the table without a plate. That's an extra two dollars for the handling fee.

3. You can choose between the "vermin" and "cockroach" section.

4. Your french toast looks strangely like a bunch of McDonalds fries with syrup on it.

5. The menus are actually scribbled drawings on napkins.

6. The only special is the prime rib for your first born.

7. You have to tip the waitress by putting a dollar bill in her thong.

8. The restrooms are spotless because they know you'll be using it after the meal.

9. If it's your birthday, instead of singing you a song, they charge you double.

10. Adam Morrison is working there.

June 29, 2009

Northern Rangers: New Intro

A special shout out to Bryce for as we here at Just South of North proudly introduce the new intro to the Northern Rangers! Here it is:


Tune in on Wednesday as the Northern Rangers are road tripping down to Portland, Oregon for the Sounders FC vs. Portland Timbers game!

You'll be able to see the true Sounders experience on the road!

Northern Rangers: Grizzly Country

Some how the Northern Rangers wound up in Missoula, Montana. Grizzly Country. Dangerous Country. Uh oh.


Epic Photo: Anti Monkey Butt Powder

Saw this on Huckleberries Online.

MIA spotted this sign outside John Montandon’s Ace Hardware on Sherman in CdA a few minutes ago. She isn’t familiar with this product and is hoping some savvy HBO’ers might be able to enlighten us on it’s proper application.

I'm just wondering if the Anti-Monkey Butt Powder is tax-free in Idaho.

This weekend in review (bring your soccer cleats)

Pushing my leftist, soccer-loving agenda (good god what has happened to me?), here are some things that happened this weekend.

Brazil shocked that United States has a soccer team -
Up 2-0 on one of the world's best soccer teams, the US couldn't hold on against Brazil and ended up losing 3-2. The difference? Apparently you cant win soccer games when the other team possesses the ball 60 percent of the time.

Billy Mays dies -
In terms of shocking, this was up on the list. Forget about Michael Jackson, this was the guy that sold us Oxi-Clean!

Seattle Sounders FC get big win over Colorado -
the boys in green shut down a team that had an 8-game unbeaten streak. The Colorado Rapids were stunned 3-0 by Seattle, Kasey Keller recorded his fifth shutout of the season (which means that Oliver Platt has scored more times than opponents of the Sounders).

Hoopfest -
Judging from the amount of 50-year old men suffering from heat stroke, I'd say that it was Hoopfest weekend in Spokane. I caught the tail end of it and it was full of "those guys" that decided their 230-pound 5'4" frame was fine for non-shirt wearing. Ewwww.

The Seattle Mariners take two against the best team in baseball -
Really? Those M's? If their lineup wasn't taking at-bats like it was t-ball, they might have something in Seattle.

Brandon went to Chewelah, Casey went to Montana -
Where the cattle to human ratio is something like how many back-breaking strikeouts Ken Griffey Jr. has to home runs.

Yankees change their uniforms

Here's the new Yankees cap for the rest of the season. I like it. What do you think?

Man Card Rules: Talking sports out your butt

I don't expect everyone to know the game of baseball, heck, I'm pretty dumb when it comes to the nuances and specific details of the game (Luckily I have the human encyclopedia of baseball in Dylan Kitzan to reference). Unless you've played the game at a high level, there are things that you simply won't know about the game.

However, don't try to talk baseball out your butt with a "I know what the hell I'm talking about" voice and say this:

"You know, why the heck do they have Ichiro as the leadoff batter? That just doesn't make sense"

Hmmm, apparently Mr. Genius Manager-in-Training would like one of the best leadoff hitters of our generation to bat ninth?

If you don't know the game, don't make dumb statements that not only reveal that you have no idea how the game is played but you're such a blow hard that you have to try and make people think you're smart.

Which you're not. Please, hand over the Man Card.

Reasons why there weren't any posts yesterday...

1. Casey was dropped off on a desert island with a Wilson ball. His only form of communication was seashell with string.

2. Brandon discovered Tivo, and hasn't stopped watching television since.

3. The death of Michael Jackson slowed the Internet to the point where Amish people had a faster connection than Brandon.

4. The curse of the Chicago Cubs somehow rubbed off on Just South of North.

5. We were drunk. It was Hoopfest weekend.

June 27, 2009

Reasons why you're still single... fireworks

You're spending Saturday afternoon with duct tape, a fuse and gunpowder. These are the tools you use to make your world famous fireworks, the power of the devices not yet known because you're completely making these things up as they go.

Throw in some brake cleaner, other flammable materials, shotgun BBs, and a myriad of other terrible things and you're a "Rescue 911" episode waiting to happen.

Hope you have a happy 4th of July!

Epic Video: Survive a Bad Wedding Table

A little survival tip. Sure hope this isn't me today.

Reasons why you're still single... T-shirts you own

If you own these t-shirts. Chances are you've probably seen nobody naked in the last 2 years (porn doesn't count).





Epic Photo: Give them credit, they spelled God right

Some of you may have detected a hint of sarcasm when I talk about topics like religion and politics. While I'd like to apologize to our religious readers, you've got to admit that some Christians in this country really play to stereotypes and overall just make an absolute mockery of what they believe in.

Meet the Glory for Christ Football League.

(Religion and football obviously have been done before, Notre Dame anyone?)

...the McDaniels huddled with two other families and formed a team of 18 players ages 12 to 18.

Blessings fell at their feet. A college abandoned football and provided affordable uniforms and gear. A private high school canceled its season, and the team, now called the North Georgia Falcons, assumed the schedule.

From that small seed has sprouted the Glory for Christ Football League, eight teams composed of home-schoolers and students at small Christian academies.

Two other families?! That's it. I shudder to think how many children were in each family or how many minivans it takes to man a football game.

The McDaniels and others have since warmed to Georgia’s policy, content to operate independently and set their own bylaws. Glory for Christ has hung a “no girls allowed” sign that contrasts with the state association’s policy.

But don't forget to take a look at the Glory for Christ Babymaking and Cooking League. Coming to you soon!

The notion that home-schoolers wanted to play football was largely foreign until quarterback Tim Tebow helped the University of Florida win two national titles. Tebow, who competed on a high school team, demonstrated that a home-schooler could absorb a playbook as well as the Book of Deuteronomy.

I bet you that New York Times writer thought he was borderline Rick Reilly when he wrote that last line.

“It’s so fun to be in a Christian environment, with people that care about people,” said Zach, who played last season while raising his grades to attain a college scholarship from the state. “They gave me a second chance.”

But once a player becomes a Falcon, Roger McDaniel said, “if you mess up one time, you’re gone.”

Again, it's that Christian forgiveness that we've all grown to love and adore.

Three Glory for Christ teams participated in a recent Saturday jamboree in Ball Ground, about 50 miles north of Atlanta. Afterward, the players kneeled and bowed their heads.

“What a great afternoon of fellowship,” Roger McDaniel said, beginning an upbeat minisermon as the players’ kin widened the human circle. “The Lord loves football, too.”

Gag.

Listen, having been to a private Christian school and a public school, I have to say that the public school environment was much more effective in preparing me as an adult. I kind of get offended with these stories about private and religious groups turning their noses up at public schools like we're some simmering pit of sin and debauchery. If you're trying to go out and serve the world, and minister to people - shouldn't you actually live with your people?

This sort of "head in the sand" philosophy and overall isolation only serves to drive bigger divides between mainstream America and religious America. I mean just look at those lines in the article and can you really say that's a healthy or realistic mindset?

And how are these kids going to handle being out on their own if they get a shot at college football after being celled up in this religious league away from real world temptations and pressure?

Just questions to ask yourself.

Spokane - Oklahoma City Game Photos






















June 26, 2009

Shock-Yard Dawgz Game Log


Final score here from the Arena is 61-28 Shock. What was a close game early turned into a laugher in the third quarter. The Shock keep their undefeated season alive with the convincing win!

4th, 0:54 to go: Might have been a good game down the stretch had Oklahoma City decided to score in the second half. As it stands, they're probably looking at their final possession and a "0" on the scoreboard during the final two quarters. That's a shame...

4th, 2:20 to go: Getting a little feisty out on the field with Stanley Franks and whatever chump is returning kicks for the Yard Dawgz. Could be interesting to see what happens in the final few minutes, as OKC has taken a couple cheap shots at Shock players...

4th, 3:09 to go: Markee White is my favorite Spokane Shock player. No reason, just thought you all should know. He did just grab his second TD pass of the game and gave the fans chalupas, though. I guess that's part of the reason. Shock- 61, Yard Dawgz- 28.

4th, 7:04 to go: Casey Hansen is in the game. Not that he's bad, but when he enters for a healthy first-stringer, it's a pretty good indication that the Shock are ready for next week before this week ends.

4th, 7:22 to go: The JOKAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH again! Sure, he only returned this one to his own 8-yard line, but the pick in the end zone ensures that, barring a miracle, the last few minutes of this one are for entertainment purposes only. Not much shocking of the world going on tonight.

4th, 9:00 to go: I thought the Shock were going to break the record for most penalties in an af2 game. Now, it's all Yard Dawgz. Two fouls on one play has them close and another TD for The Thrill Raul Vijil isn't going to calm them down a whole lot. Jackson's kick is blocked, but it's all but over regardless. Shock- 54, Yard Dawgz- 28.

4th, 11:41 to go: Trying to tackle Raul Vijil must be like trying to catch a knuckleball, because nobody can do it. At least not on the first four tries.

4th, 14:09 to go: What was once a promising drive turned into a lesson in ineptitude, as OKC failed miserably down by the goal line (dropped pass, penalty, broken plays) and turned the ball over on downs. The Shock are a TD away from wrapping this game up.

End 3rd: The Yard Dawgz have marched down the field, but have yet to score on this drive. Down 20, it's clear that Herm Edwards and Art Shell have taken over the clock management duties for the visiting team.

3rd, 3:26 to go: The JOKAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Sergio Gilliam reads the first play of the new OKC series like a book, makes the pick and returns it to the house to blow this game open. Another miss on the extra point by Jackson, but in a matter of seconds, this game looks to be well in hand for the undefeated Shock. Shock- 48, Yard Dawgz- 28.

3rd, 4:10 to go: Touchdowns this half: Davila- 2, OKC- 0. Not a good stat for a team looking to Shock the world. OKC is going to need a response on this possession or the game could be out of reach by the fourth quarter. Shock- 42, Yard Dawgz- 28.

3rd, 7:23 to go: Finally something else to talk about. After a great pass rush, The Chainsaw Kevin McCullough picks off a weak pass to give the Shock some serious momentum. With the ball in Yard Dawgz territory, Spokane is 14 yards away from taking a two-score lead.

3rd, 10:38 to go: I know I've beaten the flags into the ground for the last 15 minutes, but like the game, the penalties are ruining the flow of the game log. I apologize. The Shock are on the 1-yard line, courtesy of some good football (just crediting something else). Davila on the keeper and for the first time in the contest, the Shock take the lead. Shock- 35, Yard Dawgz- 28.

3rd, 13:17 to go: Number of plays run in the second half so far: 4. Number of penalties: 4. Just saying.

3rd, 15:00 to go: The over/under on number of plays it takes the referees to call something is 0.5. I'm taking the under. Sure enough, on the kickoff, offsides on OKC. I'm calling it a win for me because I can.

Halftime: OKC doesn't score with the final play of the half and after two quarters, the Shock find themselves in a...oh, I can't resist, Dawg fight with the visiting team, tied at 28.

2nd, 0:07 to go: Markee Mark White and the rest of the Funky Bunch tie the game with 7.9 ticks left in the half on a beautiful play. White found himself more open for business than a strip joint with Patrick Ewing and Pacman Jones in town and Davila didn't miss him. Yard Dawgz- 28, Shock- 28.

2nd, 0:23 to go: The most penalties for one team in af2 history is 21 by the Tri-Cities Fever, just two months ago. The Shock had five in the first quarter and have more than that in the second. Meanwhile, a long QB scramble by Davila has Spokane in OKC territory with 13.3 seconds left in the half.

2nd, 0:43 to go: I'm looking up the record for most penalties in one game. OKC just hit paydirt on the ground for the fourth time in the game. What a weird one we've got going on... Yard Dawgz- 28, Shock- 21.

2nd, 1:26: Trying to stop the offense from scoring. Defense. 10-yard penalty, even though the Shock scored on the play. First down. Oh well, Davila just hit Vijil for a TD. Pretty sure it counts. Waiting... waiting... the two-point conversion is good after Markee White just made the best af2 catch I've seen in person... waiting on the initial TD to count... Yard Dawgz- 21, Shock- 21.

2nd, 2:23 to go: This game has the flow of molasses in January. If I get a halftime sheet, you'll see what I mean.

2nd, 3:52 to go: I just saw Shock offensive lineman Kyle Young throw his hands up in disgust at another flag. It was on Oklahoma City.

2nd, 5:21 to go: Is the Shock Achilles' heel really run defense? No wonder they're 11-0. Another rushing TD by OKC and all of a sudden, the 'upset' word is lingering. Flag in the crowd. Wait, it's just a yellow bandanna on someone's head. Yard Dawgz- 21, Shock- 13.

2nd, 6:13 to go: I just made the joke with Brandon that it's like these refs are auditioning to call a Seahawks Super Bowl game. I don't even agree with the conspiracy theory that they got screwed...I just figured it was a joke that might resonate with most people reading this. Go Niners.

2nd, 8:24 to go: I was about to commend the officials for putting the whistles away before they penalized Stanley Franks for stepping on the 10-yard line. Unforgivable.

I'm still trying to figure out how the Arby's Oven Mitt gets to participate in the horse race during timeouts. There's no slit up the middle or anything...it can't even get on the thing. No chance. It's like an A-Rod at bat in a clutch situation. He's not winning anything ever.

2nd, 11:18 to go: How does Markee White not have an awesome nickname? This is the af2! You could go Marquee player, Marky Mark or something else that I didn't think of during the five seconds The Boss Harrison Nikalao was running over the Yard Dawgz D for a score. Yard Dawgz- 14, Shock- 13.

2nd, 13:32 to go: The refs just threw another flag, but I don't think they know why. They're huddling to make up a call. The verdict is illegal contact on the defense. I saw what happened. The correct call would have been either holding or nothing. It was wishy-washy at best. Much like these refs. Whoops, they just penalized me for unsportsmanlike journalism.

1st, 0:09 to go: I have no idea how the Yard Dawgz have a) seven wins and b) an eight point lead. They don't throw the ball well. They have two rushing TDs in a pass-dominant league. Nevertheless, the score doesn't lie... Yard Dawgz- 14, Shock- 6.

1st, 2:58 to go: Note to OKC: Delay of game penalties are only good on fourth down when you take them on purpose. Followed by a Spokane encroachment flag. I'm about to get five yards for encroaching on these officials' face. Ten penalties thus far.

1st, 5:28 to go: Flag on the field. Playing. Both sides. Penalties offset. Replay the down. Eight dollars.

1st, 5:52 to go: Seven dollars.

1st, 6:00 to go: If I had a dollar for every penalty in this game so far, I'd have like six dollars. Someone tell the stripes I have an 8:30 a.m. Hoopfest game tomorrow and would like to be on time.

1st, 7:32 to go: I didn't know they called unsportsmanlike conduct penalties in the af2. It didn't stop Nick Davila from finding Raul Vijil two plays later though, as the Shock march down the field on their first possession to score. A Brian Jackson missed extra point leaves Oklahoma City on top early, however. Yard Dawgz- 7, Shock- 6.

1st, 11:50 to go: Oklahoma City returned the opening kickoff to Spokane's 3-yard line, but their first three run plays resembled the Patriots trying to run on Derrick Thomas in Tecmo Super Bowl. Unfortunately, on 4th and goal, the Yard Dawgz found a way to punch the ball in on the ground. Yard Dawgz- 7, Shock- 0.

About to get under way here at the Arena. According to Brandon, the Yard Dawgz have claimed they're about to "Shock the world." I don't know if they were being clever with the pun or what, but for a 7-5 team, it's a gutsy claim.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Last week, the Tri-Cities Fever proved to be as formidable an opponent for the Spokane Shock as college teams are to MLB squads not named the Washington Nationals during spring training. Tonight, the Shock put their undefeated record on the line against a quality opponent in the Oklahoma City Yard Dawgz. A few things to note prior to the 7 p.m. kickoff:

The Yard Dawgz have won three straight games and scored 93 points last week in a 52-point victory over Corpus Christi.

Oklahoma City is ranked 11th in the af2 poll with a record of 7-5.

The Yard Dawgz did not hijack an af2 team from Seattle.

Oklahoma City is 2-3 on the road this season.

That's all for the pregame. Be sure to check in here at 7 p.m. for live game updates and commentary from Spokane Tribe Field.

Epic Photo: Megan Fox

I saw this on Superherohype.com.

This is Fox before the Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen release in LA.

She looks like she's straight out of Star Wars. I wonder if she brought along a laser.

At least Obama isn't playing around with interns

For all you presidential haters out there who are insulted at the prospect of Obama throwing out the first pitch at this year's MLB All-Star game, Dylan Kitzan from Unforgivable has some choice words for you.

I'm sorry, but people who freak out over the president attending a baseball game need to chill out and gain some perspective. It's been a point of contention for McCain supporters and Obama haters since January that Obama is an avid sports fan. He appeared on SportsCenter during March Madness, filling out his bracket (which had UNC winning it all). He plays basketball regularly. And now, Obama will be at Busch Stadium in July to watch the American League All-Stars take on the National League All-Stars. Big whoop.

If you haven't noticed, Obama has been getting work done while doing all of this. The United States' image worldwide is improving in the post-Bush era. The automotive industry has great potential to rebound and hundreds of thousands of jobs are being created throughout all 50 states. Sure, there are a plethora of problems with our country, both big and small, but there always are and there always will be. When's the last time a president fixed every problem and satisfied every U.S. citizen? OK, just checking.

Listen, I'm not much of a political guy, but to jump on the president's case for being a sports fan is wrong. He's still only one man with a wife and kids and has his own life to juggle while being America's Top Dog. Of course he needs to allocate more time to his responsibilities as president than to his free time or his personal interests, but to those on his case for attending a baseball game or shooting some hoops, I say relax and think about it for a second.

For every hour he spends at a ball game, he's probably spending several weeks or months fixing what's wrong with this country. That's more than I'm doing or will ever do. And chances are, it's more than his critics are doing or will ever do.

I'll agree with that, although I'm sure Fox News will dig up the transportation bill on this one. The real problem with politics is that people choose sides, dig in and make no rational choices whatsoever.

The same kind of stupid criticism happened when Bush was is in office and now conservatives have just shifted roles. If you really step back and look at the whole picture you realize that the left and right factions are the same thing in different packaging.

As for Obama, I hope he doesn't do this.

Shock take on Yard Dawgz and bad spelling practices

When Spokane Shock Director of Communications Kevin Maloney had to put together a game preview for last week's game against Tri-City, I'm pretty sure he was hard-pressed to write anything other than "we should completely stomp this team."

This week should be a bit tougher with the Oklahoma City Yard Dawgz. In fact, it should be the biggest test of the Spokane Shock in a long time. With the exception of Boise, everybody else is gawd-awful in the division.

Factor in (and you have to factor this in) that the Shock are probably the most talented and well-run organizations in the league and you basically have the equivalent of the Red Sox playing in the AL West. This week was the 15th straight time they were ranked above everyone else in the coaches poll.

RANK
TEAM
PTS
1
Spokane
381 (21)
2
Tulsa
354 (3)
3
W-B/Scranton
334 (1)
4
Tennessee Valley
297
5
Boise
292
6
Arkansas
258
7
South Georgia
241
8
Iowa
206
9
Kentucky
195
10
Green Bay
171
11
Oklahoma City
161
12
Bossier-Shreveport
146
13
Rio Grande Valley
126
14
Florida
62
15
Manchester
53
16
Albany
42

As you can see, Oklahoma City is ranked 11th and was actually undefeated in early May. However, a nasty five-game losing streak dropped them in the poll. Since then they've won three in a row and scored 93-points last week against Corpus Christi.

In other words, the Shock can't sleep on this 7-5 team.

And really, any self-loving Pacific Northwest fan would love to see the Shock kick the mother-loving crap out of a team from Oklahoma City, who's fans seem absolutely fine with stealing an NBA franchise from Seattle. If anyone from the Shock is reading this, I would beg them to go in for the kill and a player needs to bust out a Sonics jersey at some point in the game.

Preferably when they're up by 40.

Oh and don't forget, we'll be running a live game blog as Dylan Kitzan will be watching from the press box, so stay tuned!

A wedding is all about the cake

First off, I'd like to say that Montana has Internet. Sure I had to climb to the top of a ridge and cover myself in aluminum foil. Thanks to this, I have been able to catch a slight signal.

Today I have to attend a wedding. And since I have yet to see the cake, I'll judge these peoples wedding cakes.


This is James Bond. This cake is epic.



This is a purple spaceship thingy. This cake is not epic.



If this cake doesn't scream classy, I don't know what will.


A cake that is a replica of the bride. Creepy!


I have a very strong feeling that this wedding will not be lasting.



This cake looks like something Brandon and I would bake. Please notice the KFC cup in the background.

Man Card Rules: That Video Store Guy

There's nothing wrong with getting some DVDs for the weekend.

But...

When you look like you just came from the bottom of a leaking oil pan, and you peruse the video store for a small mountain of DVDs and place them in your customized video carrier - you might have a problem.

You're a model of constant harassment. Badgering the poor person working at the video store, asking them questions like:

"How's the new Indiana Jones movie, I saw it, but I don't remember it?"

and

"How much to Playstation 3s cost these days, I don't want to spend over three-hundy, already spending enough on my Executive Netflicks Account?"

Who are you? And better yet... who has time to watch 50 DVDs in five days? Please leave your Man Card at the door.