April 1, 2009

Classifieds in the Star Wars Galaxy...



Help Wanted - Somebody to track down Han Solo, he owes me a CRAPLOAD of money. Will reward handsomely and you'll even get a ride on my swank sail barge.

For Rent - Death Star - Slight fire damage, capacity for 5,000,000 people. Needs some work around the exhaust ports.

Looking for - Anyone with the last name Skywalker. You're suppose to cause the downfall of the Empire. Where the hell are you? In the freakin' desert?

Looking for - Princess slave girl. Preferably from Alderaan, if you can also bring me Han Solo two I'll throw in two rides on my swank sail barge. And now that you think about it, I need a droid translator as well.

Job Opening - Head Fleet Commander for Empire - Had disagreement with last fleet commander. Choked him to death. Please send resume and references. Rebel officers need not apply.

Nerf Herder Needer - Must be scruffy looking.

Lost - Lightsaber - I'm looking for my dad's blue lightsaber, it was lost when he cut my hand off in a fight. It was last seen in Cloud City.

Reward - For anyone who kills Jar Jar Binks - and George Lucas

1 comment:

  1. Wasn't looking for anything listed and was hoping that I could find a ton-ton to use for a warm place to sleep. Dang!

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