What Matthew Stafford is thinking after he signed with the Detroit Lions...

1. There's a lot of Southern people in Detroit that like big-armed Georgia quarterbacks right?

2. I'm really glad that I can finally play for a really, really good college football team.

3. At least the $41.7 million will be able to cover all my medical bills after I'm sacked into oblivion.

4. A-rod told me that this was the best possible career move. This - and kissing a mirror.

5. I'm glad the Lions signed Ryan Leaf as my life coach for this upcoming season.

6. At least there's plenty of convenience stores that have Old English 40s on tap.

7. I officially have more money than the Ford Motor Company now.

8. Now I can finally concentrate on my poetry career.

9. I hope I'm rate above an 80 on Madden 10

10. DAMMIT ALL TO HELL! I'M PLAYING FOR THE FREAKIN' LIONS. I WOULD HAVE MUCH RATHER PLAYED TO WIN THE GAME FOR HERM EDWARDS AND THE TORONTO ARGONAUTS THAN PLAY FOR THE LIONS. I WILL BE COACHING HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL IN IDAHO IN ABOUT FOUR YEARS. AHHHHHH!

Inside the Michigan State locker room during halftime of the national championship game

If you slept through the national championship game than you know that UNC basically dominated the Michigan State Spartans for forty straight minutes. It got so bad Dylan Kitzan from Unforgivable to make the statement "I wonder if they're going to cutaway from this game to show replays from last year's championship game."

Anyways, down 55-34 at halftime, you had to wounder what was being said in the Spartans locker room.

"At least we're not getting shut out!"

"You know if we leave now I'm sure nobody will notice. Let's just sneak out of the back of Ford Field, you know, that secret exit where the Detroit Lions always slink out of."

"We're number two! We're number two!"

"Come on guys, people are changing the channel over to the Mariners. Seriously, the Mariners."

"It's 0-0 now in the second half, except that we spotted them 21 points."

"I'm drunk."

"Who ordered the cake with the girl inside? Where did this come from and why does it say 'for Roy?'"

"Can I just play Guitar Hero with Bobby Knight?"

"Well, at least we aren't losing to Duke..."

Stay away from this man

So the Seattle Seahawks think that the best way to improve their team is to hire a man that just went 0-16 with the Detroit Lions?

...the Tribune and the Seattle Times reported that Marinelli was in Seattle on Monday to interview with the Seahawks, purportedly for the defensive coordinator's job, even though current coordinator John Marshall has not been dismissed yet.

The good news is that Chicago's head coach Lovie "I'll keep playing my quarterback no matter how many back-breaking interceptions he makes" Smith, has already extended an offer to Marinelli to join his staff.

Art Shell is also available too, guys.

Happy Thanksgiving from Just South of North

And yes, that's the Temple of Doom in the background.