Epic Photo: Bigfoot

Check out this poster I found on the Oregon Humane Society. I could so do their marketing. I love bigfoot.

Giant squid

I am fascinated by all the unknown. Big Foot, yeti, Nessie, all that type of stuff.

And I think it's awesome when people come across things like giant squids. Since they fall in the cryptozoology area.

Check out this article of a giant squid that was caught off the coast of Louisiana.

Northern Rangers: The Ape Caves

This week the Northern Rangers headed down to Mount St. Helens to hike, camp and explore.

One of the attractions of the active volcano is the Ape Caves.

Facts about the Ape Caves

• This cave is the longest continuous lava tube in the continental United States.
  
• There are two different routes to explore. The upper cave and the lower cave.
• The lower cave is an easy hike and about 3/4 of a mile long.
• The upper cave is about 1 1/2 miles long.
• The upper cave also includes obstacles and is much more difficult.
  

Driving Directions

• From Interstate 5 take Exit 21, the Woodland Exit
• Travel east on Highway 503 and USFS Road 90 for about 36 miles
  
• Turn left onto USFS Road 83 and proceed another 2 miles to the junction of USFS Roads 83 and 8303.
• Turn left onto USFS Road 8303 and proceed about 1 mile to the parking lot of lower entrance to Ape Caves

One thing we did notice about the caves was the amount of garbage in them. Please, if you do the hike, don't litter. If you pack it in, pack it out. It's that simple.

Epic Photo: Yeti

This is why yeti scare me.

Epic Video: Messin With Sasquatch

Brandon and I tried this. Instead of Sasquatch we got an angry puma.

Montauk Monster the next big foot?

I don't know about you, but I am fascinated with the unknown. UFO's, sasquatch, moth man, loch ness. These things just amaze me. But I've always been fascinated with cryptozoology.

And now comes the Montauk Monster. Part 2.

I say part two because this is the second time an unidentifiable animal corpse has watched ashore the beaches of New York.

You can read more about this strange discovery on the Montauk Monster Web site.

Reasons why you're still single: Yellow Speedo

You run the entire Bloomsday Race in a yellow Speedo. And only shoes.

Oh, and you're a six-foot-six-inch, Sasquatch hairy, 300 pound man.

Please pick one of the following words.

Sexy.

or

Gag.

How to get the Sounders FC on the winning track again

It's been a bit of a difficult run for the Sounders these past two weeks. First, they lost their first game of the season 1-0 to Kansas City at Qwest Field with Casey and I in attendance. In that game goalie Kasey Keller was given a red card, meaning that not only did the team have to play the rest (and majority) of the game one-man down, but he would also miss the next game.

Then yesterday without Keller they dropped their second match of the season to division-leading Chivas USA. Sounders FC star Fredy Montero missed an empty net shot at the beginning of the game, a miss that he admits changed the entire complexion of the match.

Now at 3-2, the Sounders have nine points and second place in the Western Conference. Not a bad spot, especially for an expansion team, but here's how they could get back to their winning ways...

1. Get Casey and I to play for the opposing team -
Casey played football, and I was scratched from one of my sixth-grade matches because I got my Velcro shoes all tangled up in the goal net. They had to cut me out.

2. Sign Youppi, the former mascot of the Montreal Expos - Not only is he an awesome mascot, but he also could add to the sex appeal to the team. What girl would not be taken aback by his rugged Canadian good looks.

3. Play against the Yankees - We're pretty sure they'd give up 22 goals in a soccer game too.

4. Get Sasquatch to play for the Sounders - Because what soccer player is going to say "You know what, I'll cover the hulking hairy mammoth that's known for eating livestock. Yep, that's me. No I'm not intimidated at all."

5. Employ the "Brandon Hansen playing FIFA 93 on the SNES" strategy - And slide tackle the hell out of everyone until they have to bring out the SNES Madden ambulance that runs over players standing out in the middle of the field.

So there you have it. Next up will the the San Jose Earthquakes at Qwest Field on April 25.

Northwest animals I don't want to meet in the dark

Nighttime visitors to Maine's Rolland F. Perry City Forest may want to watch their backs. Apparently a territorial great horned owl has been "attacking" nighttime cross country skiers in the area.

He'll fly up behind then and smack the skier on the back of the head.

This got me thinking, I certainly wouldn't want to be smacked by an owl and his talons. And since I spend a lot of time in the woods, here's my Top 10 least favorite Pacific Northwest animals to run into at night time.

10. Slug/snail - Just look at the photo above. These things may seem slow and slimy, but they're crazy! Just look at those teeth!

9.Giant Puget Sound octopus - Not only could he suck my face off with one of his tentacles, but he could crush my head with any of his eight arms.

8. Western rattlesnake - A snake bit would not be fun. Let alone at night time. At least they hangout on the eastside of the state. Suckers.

7. Northern scorpion - Putting on a boot with a scorpion in it is not a good way to head to the bathroom in the middle of the night.

6. Cougar - The giant cat kind would tear me apart. The Washington State kind is just annoying. If I had the choice between the two, I'd rather take my chances with the big cat.

5. Angry prairie dog - If you try to pet these guys they bite. I know this. First hand.

4. A rutting moose - That, nobody wants to see. Get a room.

3. Orca - A giant whale that could eat me while I kayak in the Puget Sound, or jump out of the water and crush me. Not a good way to enjoy a full moon kayak trip.

2. Sasquatch - A: Nobody would believe me. B: He'd probably beat me up.

1. Brown bear - Especially a brown bear with her cub. I'd be lunch.

Sasquatch! goes green

When you think of outdoor rock concerts what do you think of?

I think of loud music, dancing people, warm summers and lights from the stage.

One thing I don't think of is the carbon footprint left by that concert.

Well someone is because the annual Sasquatch! Music Festival in George, Washington (hehe, George Washington) has decided that they will do their part to go carbon neutral.

The music festival spans three days, May 23-25, at the Gorge Amphitheater.

Here's some of the ways the show will be trying to lessen their carbon footprint:

-Expanded recycling stations
-"Rideshare" programs to get to the show
- Offer concert goers the chance to purchase the "Green Gorge Pass"

The first two are pretty simple, the third is a bit more complicated. According to the Carbon Harmony Site, the Green Gorge Pass is this:

Heading to the Gorge? Esurance and Carbon Harmony have teamed up to present the Green Gorge Pass. For just $4, Carbon Harmony will offset your share of greenhouse gas (GHG) emissions. Your Green Gorge Pass will go towards funding the reduction of GHG emissions on dairy farms. Methane collection and combustion projects convert methane gas from animal waste into clean electricity.

This internationally recognized process offers two benefits: GHG reduction and renewable energy generation. The Chicago Climate Exchange approves the procedures, and verifies that they comply with international standards.

So basically pay $4 extra bucks and somebody else will clean up your carbon mess. It's kinda like a maid for the environment. I wish I had a maid.

The show itself will be huge with a great line up this year with bands for everyone. From the Portland indie group, The Decemberists to the more well known Jane's Addiction.

Tickets for the show go on sale this Saturday, February 28, 2009. So grab your tickets to this show and at the same time pick up your Green Gorge Pass.

Man Sasquatch are cool.

Vancouver 2010 Mascots

I just came across the mascots of the 2010 Vancouver Olympics. Yeah. They pretty much rock. The best part is, go to each of their sites and they will talk.

Quatchi- He's a sasquatch. Epic. Here's his bio:

Quatchi is a young sasquatch who comes from the mysterious forests of Canada. Quatchi is shy, but loves to explore new places and meet new friends.

View his page here.


Miga- She's a seabear. Yeah. Odd. Here's her bio:

Miga is a young sea bear who lives in the ocean with her family pod, beyond Vancouver Island, near Tofino, British Columbia. Sea bears are part killer whale and part bear. (Miga is part Kermode bear, a rare white bear that only lives in British Columbia.)

View her page here.


Sumi- He's an animal spirit. All I can say is WTF? Here's his bio:

Sumi is an animal spirit who lives in the mountains of British Columbia. Like many Canadians, Sumi's background is drawn from many places. He wears the hat of the orca whale, flies with the wings of the mighty thunderbird and runs on the strong furry legs of the black bear.

View his page here.

The Olympics start February 12, 2010. With mascots like these, it should be legendary.

A date with Sasquatch

Growing up in the Pacific Northwest I spent much of my free time camping in the foothills of Mount Rainier. There I saw everything from squirrels to yellow-bellied marmots. But never Sasquatch.

And I had plenty of opportunities to. Now I'm not saying whether Big Foot is real or not. I'm simply saying that I have never seen him.

Well, Gene R. Morrill of New Hampshire claims that he not only saw Sasquatch, but that Sasquatch molested him as a child.

Here's the full story.

Morrill is getting ready to serve a sentence for molestation charges himself. Despite this, some are believing his claims.

"I take him very seriously because I know Mr. Morill has issues," said Defense Attorney Terrence Patton.

But others, think the claim is just too far fetched.

"I've had a few that have claimed abuse, but never by a mythical creature," said Stafford County Detective Darryl Wells.

Residents of the town don’t seem to buy the man's claims either.

"What? Are you serious," said one resident.

"I just don’t believe it," said another resident.

We here at Just South of North know that molestation charges are NO laughing matter. However, molestation charges against Bigfoot are.

So now I am curious. If these claims against Bigfoot are true. Do you think I could get a lady Sasquatch to go on a date?

Maybe a nice larva and moss soup. With some fresh spring water to wash it down. We could take a walk in a heavily forested area. After that we would make a brief appearence in a meadow, so some backpackers would see us, and then vanish to our underground caves.

But what if there are only male Sasquatches?!?!

Great. So now when I go camping I not only have to worry about rain, but now waking up in the middle of the night to Sasquatch in my sleeping bag. Do you think he'll call me back?

Oh, and this video may be proof Bigfoot is real.