"That" Bar Guy

I've been sampling the Spokane nightlife the past couple of nights and one thing is apparent, "That" Bar Guy has recently found a comeback in numbers rivaling the resurgence of the Grey Wolf in Montana. So if you'd to avoid having your evening "douched-up" than I highly recommend you avoid these people.


That guy that tries to pick fights with anyone he can


Instead of going to the bar to get laid, which he desperately needs to do, he instead stands at the urinal in the bar bathroom looking for somebody to pick a fight with. If that person so much as coughs funny, this guy immediately goes to "Homophobia Deathcon 3" in which case he follows the perpetrator out to his large group of friends and starts yelling "that guy in the red shirt is trying to start some shit."


However, this guy in all of his douchebaggery, usually picks the most laid back and easy-going group of the bunch who happens to be wearing a red shirt, causing his friends to give this guy the "I hope Rosanna Barr sits on your f---ing head someday" look.


Keep in mind this guy is usually around 40 years old, balder than Gary Payton (except for the sides) and dates 16-year old girls.


That guy that dances by himself... alot.


His unfortunate attraction to music has led him to try and "Save the Last Dance." Problem is, nobody wants to dance with him and his moves look like something out of the Chris Farley/Patrick Swayze Chippendales skit.


And then when he tries to pull out the in-air spin moves, the facade of his fedora/wifebeater/tap shoes falls straight through the floor.


That guy that takes of his shirt to ride the mechanical bull


...and throws it directly on that guy that tries to pick fights with anyone he can.


That guy that has a popped collar and tan that would make an Oompa Loompa jealous


But who cares if no girls want to dance with us. There's 20 of us brosephs here and we're having the time of our lives. HIGH FIVE!!!

That guy who's apparently sunburned because his frail ginger skin can't handle the summer sun

Avoid at all costs.