May 23, 2013

Why I didn't like a great Star Trek movie (SPOILER ALERT)

Let me preface this by saying I loved the new Star Trek in 2009. I'm not one of those cronies that complain that it isn't William Shatner playing Kirk, or that it's a completely different universe or something like that. Whatever. It's a movie. It's entertaining. And it's a whole heck of a lot faster-paced than Star Trek: Insurrection where Picard and company saved a bunch of people from ... getting transported off the planet. (WOWEE, so exciting)

But Star Trek Into Darkness is basically Star Trek's Greatest Hits. It's done well. It's paced well, there are several character driven scenes that are a nice touch. You've got perhaps one of the coolest Star Trek villians since Khan (oh wait, it is Khan). The action is always just spectacular.

J.J. Abrams, however, has taken elements from the original Star Trek 2 and 3 and mashed them into this movie. Those were great movies, but I've already bought the DVDs and I want to meet something new. What I loved about the 2009 movie was that Abrams was basically like "You know what, I'm going to pay subtle homage to Star Trek but do my own thing here."

Now? Well we have nearly a shot-for-shot recreation of the Spock death scene from "Wrath of Khan" but... instead it's Kirk! What a twist? Right guys? It's so rushed and ham-fisted, and again THE SAME EXACT SCENE WE SAW IN STAR TREK 2.

If you haven't seen the old Star Trek movies, I'm assuming you have a girlfriend or are married and not living with your parents, and STID should be really entertaining. I'm not denying this. For the rest of us losers, we've seen it before. I was hoping Abrams would have added just a little more original material to this story. We have Khan, who's brilliantly done, but we've already seen him in ST2. We have self sacrifice of a key crew member. And we have their resurrection (because apparently McCoy has found the cure for death.)

I won't pick apart the plot because who cares? It's a movie, there is going to be plot holes. The fact that Abrams took his redone Trek in the same old direction it had been taken before is annoying. It's like if he redoes the Star Wars movies and had Luke blow up the Death Star again. Lets do something new guys.

I give it 4 out of 5 stars for non-Star Trek fans, 2 out of 5 stars for Star Trek fans.

(To buy the original... and better Star Trek 2, click here)

May 21, 2013

Mind Blown: Mariners in Cleveland

Just when you think that the Mariners are turning a corner... they go to Cleveland and just completely screw things up, making every Seattle fan make the same face Jackie Chan is making.

Yesterday, the Mariners hit go-ahead home runs in the ninth and tenth innings but Cleveland catcher Yan Gomes jacked a three-run shot for the 10-8 walkoff win. What. The. Hell.

I think M's closer Tom Wilhelmsen says it best.

"We are glad to leave Cleveland," Wilhelmsen said with no trace of a smile after the Indians pulled off their third walk-off win in sweeping the four-game series. Progressive Field has turned into a house of horrors for the Mariners, who've had eight walk-off losses in Cleveland in the last seven years.

Seattle has now lost four in a row, but the good news is they're still in third place of the AL West at 20-25. But then again, if they have more crushing series like the Cleveland one, they wont be there very long. They're now in Los Angeles to play the Angels, a team with a much bigger payroll than them. Well this should be fun.

Can't explain how awesomely trashy Florida Georgia Line is

If you want a good laugh, check out the Nelly/Florida Georgia Line remix of the FGL's "Cruise" song. Perhaps one of the trashiest country songs ever produced in the Western Hemisphere, Nelly's appearance and voice synthesizing has produced was of the most hilarious faux country songs I've ever hear. Oh and I will definitely play this anytime I'm driving around Lewis County.


Do you want to see something trashier than the video above? Then check out the original FGL "Cruise" video. Yehaw!


Apparently what Nelly brings to the table is hotter girls and newer cars. What Florida Georgia Line brings to the table is a bunch of white guys that look really excited to be in a real rap video. Excellent. Now go do a remix of Numa Numa, Nelly.

(Get Florida Georgia Line's Album here -- if you live with your sister.)

May 20, 2013

Meme Mondays: Most Interesting Cat Alive

Meme Mondays! And of course its a cat meme. 

Epic Photo - Priest Point Park in Olympia, WA

Here's a photo from Priest Point Park in Olympia, WA. There's several trails along the southernmost point of South Puget Sound, and the beach provides some nice clam shell digging opportunities. Perfect for a Sunday afternoon adventure. 

(Then make sure you get ice cream at the Olympia Dairy Queen)

May 9, 2013

The Mariners are getting outdrawn by the Oakland Athletics

Oakland has been long the standard for an empty stadium. The Oakland Coliseum is more like one big gigantic cement tomb then a baseball park, and fans don't show up accordingly. Seattle, on the other hand, has one of the nicer ballparks in all of baseball and in 2013 they haven't been able to attract more than a few homeless people of the street.

Check this out...

MLB Attendance in 2013
24. Houston 19,310
25. Tampa Bay 19,144
26. Oakland 19,034
27. Miami 18,864
28. Seattle 18,751
29. Kansas City 18,497
30. Cleveland 14,205

Houston has the lowest payroll in all of baseball, Tampa Bay has that hard-core Florida sports fan base of 80-year olds that don't want to leave their RVs, Oakland is moving and their stadium is the perfect example of urban decay, Miami fire-saled their team and alienated their entire fan base, Kansas City hasn't won since the Regan Administration and nobody lives in Cleveland anymore.

What. the. heck. Seattle?

What is finally starting to sink in to the fanbase is that the Mariners have put a sub-par product out on the field for an entire decade despite ownership having the money. Their leadership up-top has just been terrible. Think back at all the trades, drafts and moves and think to yourself "When was the last time the Mariners made a smart move."

In this era of Netflix, HD TV and video games, who wants to go spend $50 to go see a team that's afraid to make a free agent move and couldn't get a hit to save their lives. Throw in that early spring is chilly in Seattle and you have this quagmire. We're approaching Kingdome level suckage for attendance.

Seattle isn't a die-hard sports town either. They're like every other city that only supports winners. The Mariners aren't winners and that's why they're getting outdrawn by the freakin' Athletics. While they keep selling "The Future" and "Rebuilding" while their present continues to crumble away.

May 7, 2013

Epic Video of Greatness: Nimoy vs. Quinto

If you're a Star Trek fan, this is the funniest ad ever.

Meme Tuesdays: Otter Jokes

So I missed Meme Monday's yesterday, but I promise I'll make up for it with an extra cute meme...

May 2, 2013

YouTube Thursdays: Why is the night sky dark?

Ever look up at the stars and wonder why it's dark? Well here's the answer...