September 28, 2011

Epic Photo: Sun

Reasons why you're still single... Sports bar fans

Shouldn't sports bars be a fun place to go to on Sunday? Instead they've become a weird gutter for society's alcoholics too root on their favorite football teams and make complete arses of themselves. There must be something about the NFL when people like these start coming through the sports bar door...

The high five guy
Usually wearing a lime green Seattle Seahawks jersey and about 10 beers in at 11 a.m. in the morning. He trolls around the bar looking for high-fives from complete strangers after big plays... or just at random. If he doesn't get a response he'll scream "BYAAAWWW!!!! Seahawks" as a sort of mating call to find some sort of high-fiving mate.

(Don't high five this guy, try to trip him as he walks by your table)

The clapper
They don't realize they're in a sports bar hundreds of miles away from the game and that the players can't actually hear when they clap. But they continue to clap. And clap. And clap. They clap for big plays. They clap for five-yard penalties. They clap for good commercials. They clap when they get their hot wings. Their clapping is so loud that is warrents that you look around and make sure somebody hasn't fired off a live pistol in the bar.

(Just install the light clapper so this a-hole has to watch the game in the dark)

The loner
Most people go to the sports bar with friends. Not this fellow. He slaps on a jersey and proceeds to be a wolfpack of one at the bar. He leers about making as much noise as possible to get attention and then looks around to see if anyone is paying attention to him. Loud clapping? Screaming? Random "Lets gow HAAAHAAAWWWWKS!" chants. He's got them all. And a drinking problem.

Green Bay Packer fans
Actually these people are awesome. My favorite kind of football fans. God bless them.

Oakland Raiders fans
They usually show up halfway through the game and make more noise than anyone when the Raiders make a big play. However, they actually have no clue who's on the team or the Raiders' record.

The girls who manage to find away to get cleavage out of a football jersey
How the heck does this happen? How?!?!?! It's like supposed to be physically impossible. HOW?!?!

September 27, 2011

NBA and NHL coming to Tacoma?

Introducing your Tacoma Supersonics!

Just doesn't have the same ring to it as Seattle, but it is a very real possibility.

A recent article shed light on this new idea of revamping the Tacoma Dome and bringing the NBA back to the area, along with perhaps the NHL.

Tacoma’s mayor and City Council say they want to know what it would take to revamp the aging Tacoma Dome to draw a pro basketball or hockey team to town – and they’re willing to pay up to $100,000 to find out.

“The NBA will be back in this market,” Mayor Marilyn Strickland said Tuesday. “When they are, I want Tacoma to be in the mix of that discussion.”

Backed by local business leaders and area politicians, the City Council agreed Tuesday to pay for part of a market feasibility study for attracting a National Basketball Association or National Hockey League team to the Dome.

The study would examine options and costs for upgrading the 29-year-old facility to NBA and NHL standards, and determine whether there’s corporate interest to help support such an endeavor, Strickland said.

Now I'd prefer a team to come back to the Seattle area just for the simple fact that I live closer to that city. But if there was the chance that this area could get not just NBA back, but also bring along the NHL, then I'm all for it.

What do you think? Would you like to see the NBA and NHL in Tacoma over Seattle? Or would you just like these sports in our state?

September 25, 2011

Pac-12 Football Championship Game

Fall is here and football is in full swing. And as if I'm not excited enough for college football every week, I now see a commercial for the Pac-12 Football Championship Game.

I can't wait!

September 24, 2011

Taxidermy is awesome

Best commercial ever.

Epic Photo: SEE YAH!

Arlee Warrior Christian Haynes makes a 34-yard pass reception. 

September 23, 2011

It's Pumpkin Spice Latte Time

It's fall. And that means Brandon's favorite drink, the Pumpkin Spice Latte at Starbucks is back. He literally drinks these things everyday till winter.

The Brandon Hansen NFL Column

Another week of football and another chance for the Seahawks to show just how terrible they are. Shall we go through a rundown of what is happening this week?

Bills vs. Patriots
The Buffalo Bills have shown considerable spunk in the early season, but anyone thinking that the Bills are going to beat the Patriots obviously haven't seen Tom Brady throw the ball. He's been a surgeon the past two weeks and right now there isn't a quarterback in the league that even comes close. Yep and that includes Ryan Fitzpatrick.

Titans vs. Broncos

Here's the truth Bronco fans... your team sucks. They suck bad. As much as you'd like to convince yourself otherwise after last week's win over the Carson Palmer-less Bengals, Chris Johnson is going to run up your backside like a crazed day-after-Thanksgiving shopper.

Dolphins vs. Browns
I really feel sorry for Miami. They play in the AFC East where they have to contend with the Pats, Jets and Bills. There's no easy game there. However, they'll have no problem with the hapless Browns, one of those rare teams that you never want to talk yourself into betting on.

Lions vs. Vikings
For some reason, people haven't given up on Minnesota yet. I have no idea why not. It's a bad team and Donovan McNabb should be staring in the next remake of "Dawn of the Dead." Meanwhile the Lions are perhaps the most upstart team in the league. Nobody wants to play these guys.

Eagles vs. Giants

Even if it is a Vick-less Eagles team, I don't think anyone realizes how turrible the Giants are.

Panthers vs. Jags

I'd make a pick for this game, but nobody will be at the game nor will anyone care about the outcome.

Packers vs. Bears
Bears win in week one and everyone is like "HERE COME THE BEARS!!!!" Boy, how things change after a 30-13 loss to the Saints. Perhaps Jay Cutler should injure his knee again.

Bengals vs. 49ers
I'm never picking the Bengals if they have a ginger as a quarterback.

Ravens vs. Rams
For some reason people made the Ravens a 3.5 point favorite over the Rams, one of the most puzzling lines in Vegas this week. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? You're assuming a Stephen Jackson-less Rams team can hang with Baltimore? The Rams are also out several other starters and they put up a listless performance against the Giants on MNF.

Chargers vs. Chiefs
What's going to give? The Chargers historically terrible start to the season or the Chiefs just plain sucking this year?

Bucs vs. Falcons
I'm going to stand by my fantasy running back Michael Turner and the Falcons on this one. Loved what they showed in their victory over the Eagles. That game was within Phili's grasp and Matt Ryan looked like one of those kids on the "Feed the starving Children" commercials after getting battered around by the Eagles' d-line. They gutted it out. Also, Tampa isn't as good as Phili.

Redskins vs. Cowboys
Tony Romo or Rex Grossman? So far this season I'm going with the quarterback that doesn't have a punctured lung.

Seahawks vs. Cardinals
Literally the only thing Seattle has going for them is that they have home field advantage and Arizona isn't that great. But... Seattle is awful and they didn't make it into the redzone last week against Pittsburgh. The Cardinals defense isn't that great but you'll have to score some points in order to defeat a football team.

September 22, 2011

Casey's Halloween costume this year.

Casey's really excited. Here's how he'll look for his big Halloween party.

Little League Cage Fighting

Another reason to hate the ridiculous sport of MMA. While sometimes they try to make it seem like a smart sport, it's really just a bunch of meatheads fighting. And when those meatheads have kids? This happens...

Police will take no action against the organisers of 'barbaric' cage fighting involving children as young as eight, it was confirmed today.

Concerns were raised about whether two boys were put at risk by taking part in a bout at Greenlands Labour Club in Preston, Lancashire, in front of a 250-strong adult audience.

But a spokesman for Lancashire Police said today the force had 'looked into this matter fully and there are no issues for us to pursue'.

Kicking, shoving and grappling each other to the floor, the youngsters were filmed competing in cage fighting contests in front of a baying mob of hundreds of adults enjoying a night’s entertainment.

Oh this is going to cause no problems further along in life...

September 21, 2011

Epic Photo: Where stormtroopers go...

Something tells me this happens a lot.

I'm Tony Gonzalez?

In true Ron Burgandy style, Tony Gonzalez's intro during the Falcons game on Sunday proves that he's got a great sense of humor.

"Who put a question mark on the teleprompter? You know Tony Gonzalez will read whatevers on there!"

This is how winter creeps into Montana

Summer is a pretty awesome time around Flathead Lake. However, winter is like the drunk guy that yells to loud at the bar and spills drinks on people.

And sadly, it's apparent right now that Winter is coming to the area... gulp.

It's starts fairly innocent... and then hits you like a wicked shimmy. Here are the stages of the Montana winter coming to kick you in the behind.

1. Summer days become a bit cooler at night, and by cooler I might you have to wear a long sleeved shirt while leaving the bar unless you've been drinking a lot, in which case you just get in your car and drive home (Montana... the worst state in the union for drunk driving!).

2. Days become more overcast and rain starts to creep in. However, this isn't like rain in Washington which is fairly predictable and light. This is like one minute sunny and then the next minute its monsooning on you. I'm assuming that's a side effect of living next to one of the country's largest freshwater lakes and a Rocky Mountain range.

3. You wake up and there's a skiff of snow. Nothing to worry about right... it melts throughout the day? However, you noticed that all of a sudden the Mountains have snow on them and the snow line keeps creeping down and down and down. JESUS! ITS GETTING CLOSER EVERYONE RUN.....

4. You wake up and your car is under two feet of snow. Please make sure there are no sharp objects around your wrist at this point.

September 20, 2011

George Clooney gets married

Well in a Norwegian commercial at least.

September 18, 2011

How excited are you about the Seattle Seahawks now?

I'm not saying their season is over (It was when they made T-Jack their quarterback), but if you're a Seattle Seahawks fan, you might want to get ready for UW basketball season. Today's 24-0 defeat at the hands of the Pittsburgh Steelers is the second straight week that the Seahawks have looked bad on offense.

They can't run the ball.

T-Jack passed for 159 passing yards. Oh boy.

And no touchdowns.

While the expectations weren't exactly high heading into the season, Seattle just doesn't have anything going. How long before fans start calling for Charlie Whitehurst to start at quarterback?

September 17, 2011

Grizzly Bear a menace to lake-going folk

See those lines there? Yes that's the movement of one Grizzly bear who's apparently the Michael Phelps of Flathead Lake. Good god.

Could it be webbed claws? Or maybe an ancient connection to a Labrador bloodline?

In any case, a young grizzly bear has demonstrated Olympian swimming skills on Flathead Lake, proved with GPS data from a satellite collar that was recovered Monday near the town of Swan Lake.

The 4-year-old female was trapped in June 2010 as a management bear because of her proximity to the Flathead Lake Lutheran Camp south of Lakeside. It was an unusual place for her to show up, well outside established grizzly bear habitat.

“We thought that because we don’t have bears very often on the west side of the lake that we would put a collar on her,” said Rick Mace, a research biologist with Montana Fish, Wildlife and Parks in Kalispell.

A decision was also made to relocate her to a remote area near Blacktail Mountain west of Lakeside, because after all, that was an area she naturally migrated to. It didn’t take long for the bear to make her way back to the lake, this time wandering south to the Rollins area.

“She spent most of 2010 on that side and then during Labor Day weekend of last year is when she started her aquatic activities,” Mace said. Aquatic activities, indeed.

Wait? Bears can swim? I'm out.

September 16, 2011

Epic Photo: Don't try on the product

Thank you, thats good to know. Not test runs in the Supermarket.

More bear fun in Montana

I always joke about Grizzly bears and living in Montana, but attacks do happen. I think I might just stay indoors until they go in hibernation for winter...

BONNERS FERRY, Idaho – A grizzly bear killed a hunter in a remote area along the Idaho-Montana border, and then was fatally shot by the hunter's partner, authorities said Friday.

 The attack was originally reported as occurring in Boundary County, Idaho, but actually took place in Lincoln County, Mont., the Boundary County Sheriff's Office said. The attack occurred about 10 a.m. Friday in the mountainous, heavily forested region near the Canadian border.

 And what was the Beacon concerned about? If the killed hunter's buddy had legally shot the bear or not. Wowza.

September 15, 2011

Worst chips ever

Does this make anyone else gag?

Washington State, why isn't this you?

I'm currently watching the LSU-Mississippi State game on ESPN and one of the camera angles showed the jumbotron on the field and it's nearly the width of the football field. Move over Jerry Jones, apparently this is how SEC football rolls.

Now if there is ever a little brother in the SEC, it is Mississippi State. While they've certainly had a good team in recent years, they're not on the level of say a Florida, LSU or Alabama. However that doesn't seem to dampen the fans enthusiasm during the game. 

And you know what? Mississippi State University is in a smaller town that Pullman, and doesn't have a Spokane-sized city to draw money and fans from (Come on it's Mississippi... you'd be lucky if there's outdoor plumbing outside the stadium). However Davis Wade Stadium is a 55,000-seat shrine to college football.

What the heck Washington State? Martin Stadium is certainly a fun place to go watch a football game but it's light years behind Davis Wade - who's jumbotron is the second largest in all of college football - and every team in the Pac-12. I mean does this look nearly as cool as David Wade?

(Granted it's empty but that's how things are looking during Cougar games lately)

I'm just aghast at the inability for the Cougs to improve seating arrangements. I don't want to be a downer here, but if you can't even fill a 35,000-seat stadium... will the Pac-12 even want you when they continue to expand.

There needs to be some serious game on-ing... and it's not the University's fault, WSU alumni are notoriously cheap (as are EWU alums, yours included). What needs to happen in the next 10 years is a major stadium renovation and improvement in seating, not the aesthetic stuff that they've been doing to the place in recent years. 

Otherwise major college football might just pass WSU by. 

Cowboys fans aren't happy

This guy isn't happy about the Cowboys losing last week...

September 14, 2011

September 11, 2011

Epic Photo: Marine

Marine Chuck Lewis stands at attention near Highway 93 on Sept. 10 in Polson, MT.

September 10, 2011

Negative yard punt by Oregon State

Last week Oregon State of the PAC 12 lost to Sacramento State of the Big Sky.

And just when things seemed like they couldn't get worse for the Beavers they punt the ball for negative four yards.

I was watching the Oregon State at Wisconsin game and almost couldn't believe what I saw when it happened.

Yes, it a negative yard punt.

Punter Johnny Hekker came onto the field and tried a rugby style kick that went wrong. It wasn't blocked, there was no wind and it wasn't a bad snap. It was just a bad kick.

September 9, 2011

Coach tells players to be like dogs

This is perhaps the strangest press conference you will ever see.

David Bennett wants his team to act like dogs instead of cats at his weekly press conference leading up to Coastal Carolina's game against Catawba

Pacman seen in Spokane

From the Inlander Blog...

Somebody got really bored and decided to play with Post-it notes in Spokane.

Things that work better than Peyton Manning's neck

1. The U.S. Economy
2. The internet in Montana.
3. Jennifer Gardner's film career.
4. M. Night Shyamalan's last three movies.
5. Tim Couch's NFL career.
6. Mel Gibson's anger management counselor.
7. FEMA's response to Hurricane Katrina.
8. C.C. Sabatha's nutritionist.
9. Rush Limbaugh's stint on ESPN.
10. Paul Wulff's coaching career at WSU.

Any other suggestions?

September 7, 2011

Epic Photo: Squirrel in Cleveland's Bullpen

"I thought he was the new rookie pitcher."

Why I'm excited for this NFL season

This Thursday, New Orleans travels to Green Bay to kick off the NFL season, meaning millions of adult males be huddled around their computers checking their fantasy football numbers. I'm one of them.

I'm particularly pumped for this NFL season for several reasons, which is quite the departure from previous years where I was good with watching college football and making fun of the pros. Here's why you should be pumped too.

Taiwan Jones will run hog wild for the Raiders
While Griz running back Chase Reynolds is mired on an NFL practice squad, Taiwan Jones will be one of the feature backs for the Raiders. How can you not root for the former eagle? He's got moves like video game Bo Jackson and speed like Paul Walker's car in "The Fast and the Furious. "

This also means I can watch Raiders games and make fun of their fans.

A Matt Hasselbeck-less Seattle Seahawks
Sorry Seahawk fans. Your team is going to be a train wreck this season. Just set your expectations low on Sundays and expect a recreation of the opening scene of "Saving Private Ryan" at Qwest Field.

Matt Hasselbeck goes to the Titans
Jack Locker and MH on my beloved Titans. I really don't know what to do. If I were the GM, I'd just invest some money in making a zombie Steve McNair.

No Brett Favre
Right Brett? You're not coming back. You are staying home and sending dong shots to interns from the comfort of your living room. Don't you dare go to the Seahawks. DONT YOU DARE.

Rex Ryan
How can you not enjoy Rex Ryan? He's like when one of your relatives has too much to drink at a family reunion and starts commenting on how one of your cousins looks pregnant...when she's not pregnant. Pure humor! Gotta love him!

I want to gamble a lot of money on games
Whats that? I lost roughly $300 today? Well crap....

The Packers are good
Lets be honest, when Green Bay has a good team, football is just a whole lot more fun. Like remember when St. Louis was the best team in football? Lame. St. Louis is a lame town. The Rams are a lame team and KURT WARNER? You've got to be kidding me.

But Green Bay? Aaron Rodgers is a steeley-eyed missile man. Their coach appears to be on the Mike Holmgrem diet and they lead the league in DBs with long cornrow dreads.

September 5, 2011

OK Go and The Muppets

If you read JustSON then you know that I'm stoked for The Muppets this fall. Well check out OK Go with a new version of the song.

And in classic Muppet style the video is filled with hilarious punchlines.

"Let's watch cat videos."

And just wait for the end...

September 4, 2011

Epic Photo: West Virginia Fans

Yup, that's how West Virginia fans do.

Things we can take away from the UW-EWU game

Many Eastern Washington fans are lamenting on what could have been last night. The Eags had a ball intercepted in the endzone to end their comeback and they fell to FBS member Washington 30-27. They outplayed, out-gained and out-quarterbacked the Huskies.

An EWU wide receiver even made it quite clear that the Huskies are one of the most arrogant teams they've played. That's kind of crazy for a football team that hasn't SHARED a national championship since the early 90s. But having followed the WSU Cougars for a long time, the Huskies' behavior doesn't surprise me at all. If there were a smug center to the universe, UW fans would be in the middle of it, sniffing their own farts.

With that, lets talk about what we learned from this game...

Eastern is legit again
While it is amazing that Sac State beat Oregon State, let me point out that the Beavers have a slow start to every season and then they come on late. Look up the scores, they always are terrible right out of the gate and that has really stunted their chances at long-term glory. But who would have thought that EWU would be playing in a very competitive game against UW? What this shows is that the Eagles could play in the Pac-12. I'm not kidding, they could. They're going to give UW a better fight than WSU and probably some other teams in the conference.

Bo Levi-Mitchell is a steely-eyed missile man
Greatest quarterback in EWU history? Erik Meyer, Matt Nichols... Bo Levi Mitchell? The guy lit up the Washington secondary like a damn Christmas tree and had Warren Moon talking about his "NFL arm." Before this season is over, Mitchell might be the best player in Eagles' history.

Husky fans are lame
We already talked about this but I want to touch on it again. You guys are the worst possible fans in the realm of college football. If I wanted to hang out with a bunch of yuppies that want to talk about how great they are, I'll go to a creative writing workshop. Any other fan base would have been going "Hey good job EWU! You played us tough" It's a respect thing. You think Husky fans would be caught dead saying that? Nope because they're UW!

I hope for nothing but losses for the University of Washington the rest of the way.

FBS in 10 to 15 years
If fans start showing up to EWU games, you've really got to start looking at a move to the FBS. They're competing with Pac-12 programs now, they're winning national championships and they have a large corporate sponsorship base in Spokane. EWU is better set for a move to the FBS than Montana or Montana State and that's the truth. While they'll have to do some work to their stadium and Spokane will need to realize there's a football team out in Cheney, it's a definite possibility now.

September 3, 2011

Epic Photo: This kid is not having a good day

Taken from the Ronan-Bigfork football game last night. Bigfork was the defending state champion in class B and Ronan took them out behind the woodshed and beat them 32-12. It was usually because of hits like these.

College Football is here!

Today is the day. College football returns to the state of Washington. And it does so in a BIG BIG way.

Heading into Husky Stadium will be the defending Eastern Washington University Eagles. Sure they might be 18 point underdogs to the home Washington Huskies but you don't win a National Championship by being a pushover team.


"Washington QB Keith Price makes his debut as Jake Locker's replacement against Eastern Washington, which is hardly a patsy. Sure, the Eagles are an FCS team. But they also are the defending FCS national champions and they are the preseason No. 1 team in FCS football. Warning! Warning!"

Now I've grown up a UW fan so this will be the first time I've ever rooted against the Dawgs, but in this matchup Eastern is my team. I have to root for the Eagles.

I've got the jersey out of the closet. It still has the smell of a National Championship on it. It's sure to be a great game and hopefully the Eagles can pull off the upset. I'll be at the game. Feel free to follow my tweets at @CaseyKnopik as I'll be tweeting before, during and after the game.