Street Racing in Spokane

Since I've graduated from college and the chance to go party and tear down a street sign or two has sadly passed by, all the excitement in my life has left. Luckily, I've taken to street racing in Spokane. If you wonder why all those cars are sitting at stoplights reving their engine it's because they're about to rap the sh** out of their Honda civic to beat the guy next to them up the street. It's a tough and mean culture that I have sadly fallen into.

My car -- a 1994 Ford Taurus with a failing U-joint and transmission is the perfect vehicle for street racing in Spokane. It has two holes in the plastic bumpers, one hole which i have plugged up with a pop can for added effect. I merely pull up to a stoplight blaring "Hamster Dance" to announce my presence.

Once all the 16-18 year olds in their vastly inadequate cars scoff at my music choice... I merely beat them off the line.

By running the red light. My 0-60 time in the Taurus is a little slow.

And then I finish the night by stopping by the local gathering of street racers in front of "Babies R' Us" on North Division Street, playing this jewel of a song.

You'll all be happy to know that I've only been shot at once or twice.