Strike up the GIT-TAR!

I've been having a music crisis lately. My iPod absolutely sucks and while driving around, most of the stuff I listen to is sports talk radio, which is enough to make me feel like grabbing a ham sandwich and talking about the New York Jets. I mean what kind of music is good to listen to anymore?

Rap -- Three letters... E.W.O. ... nuff said. If you don't get the joke, remember the movie "Kill Bill Part Two" where Uma Thurman gets shot in the chest with ground salt? That's the current state of rap right now. If I can have my own rap song, you get a picture of the wonderful state of the art form at the moment.

Emo-punk rock -- I have every one of these cds in a world. But, how many songs can you listen about a sexually confused singer whining about their girlfriend? A lot apparently. But what if you're single? What the hell do you complain about then?

Rock -- There hasn't been a good rock song since the 1980s.

Anthing coming out of Seattle -- Actually without the Pacific Northwest in the early 1990s, we probably wouldn't even be listening to music right now. We might just have a bunch of Rush Limbaugh on our iPods.

Pop -- Actually, wonderful stuff. Now if Brittney Spears can just find a way to get pregnant again.

But really, popular music has ran into a big stinkhole of creativity, and everytime i turn on the FM radio, my ears start to feel like Tiger Woods' knee during the US Open. And today's musicians really kind find anything better to do except complain, which when you're making millions of dollars... is annoying.

Luckily there's hope. I'm switching my music genre to perhaps an unpopular form of media among my peers. Country music is not only upbeat, but also patriotic. It's also catchy. If you don't like country music you're unamerian, or you probably don't actually work for a living. But hey, keep listening to that five-year old mix CD in your car since nothing any better has come up in that same time period.

I'm getting my cowboy hat sized tomorrow.