NFL Week 13 Recap

After watching the Jacksonville Jaguars roll around and die in the Reliant Stadium, I think its time to go through our new weekly installment of the NFL week recap.

Jacksonville 17, Houston 30 - Cue the footage of David Garrard stumbling while taking a snap and tripping on the foot of his center and then throwing the ball up for grabs. Good play.

Tennessee 47, Detroit 10 - Put the gun down, Lions fans.

Seattle 9, Dallas 34 - You too, Seahawks fans.

Arizona 20, Philadelphia 48 - Here's what happens when the best team in the NFC West (Ariz.) plays the worst team in the NFC East (Phil.).

NY Giants 23, Washington 7 - There's been talk that Eli Manning could be facing his brother Peyton in the race for the NFL MVP. Write that down as something I would never think I would ever type.

New Orleans 20, Tampa Bay 23 - The Bucs are showing the world that they can go 9-3 and nobody really pays attention.

Miami 16, St. Louis 12 - The Rams are still in the league? I thought they moved down to NCAA Div. II.

Carolina 35, Green Bay 31- I know there's a certain quarterback in New York that just loves watching the Packers struggle.

Indy 10, Cleveland 6 - Did you know that Indy is 8-4, and they're still not playing great football. Ladies and gentlemen, your sleeper for the Super Bowl. Remember I said it first.

Baltimore 34, Cincinatti 3 - The Ravens are also 8-4, but the AFC North seems to be getting about as much attention by the media as high school girl's basketball.

San Fran 10, Buffalo 3 - A Niners fan told me that if Arizona loses out (which they could) and the Niners win out (which... there's no freakin' way that's happening), they could win the division at 8-8. While that wouldn't shock me about the NFC West, the fact that San Francisco would be doing it would probably make my head explode.

Atlanta 22, San Diego 16 - We're watching Norv Turner's soul slowly dying in front of us.

Kansas City 20, Oakland 13 - Ladies and gentlemen, the 2-10 Chiefs and 3-9 Raiders would like to thank all four of you for attending today's game.

Pittsburgh 33, New England 10 - The Steel Curtain, stopping over-hyped quarterbacks since 2008.

Denver 34, NY Jets 17 - The Broncos pull out their patented "solid road win over a quality opponent that really doesn't mean anything because they'll lose in the first round of the playoffs anyways."

They're the best mediocre team in the league and they caught the Jets after three big emotional wins.

Chicago 14, Minnesota 34 - Gus Ferrotte is the best quarterback in the NFC North. Yep, that's how bad things are.