The Return of Brief Casey

Every experienced writer out there will tell a young writer that the key to success is writing everyday.

When I was in bed last night, I was having trouble sleeping (no Brandon, not because of gas) but because I couldn't turn off my mind. I kept coming up with idea after idea. It was great for the idea book I have, but terrible for the sleep I desperately wanted.

Well, I was laying there thinking about that advice, "write everyday." When suddenly it dawned on me, that is what I do here. And you people, just happen to be my captive audience. So I thank you for putting up with us here at Just South of North for almost a year. (Yes, almost a year). And I would like to welcome you to the epic return of Brief Casey.

Brief Casey was column that I used to write for The Easterner. It happened each week and I told some of the "stranger" stories from around the world. So sit back, kick off your shoes, maybe grab a cold beverage...

And here we go!

Our first story of the strange comes out of Bloomfield, Indiana. Here a man shaved his eyebrows to raise money for charity. What charity you might ask? Well I'm guessing it was for people without eyebrows.

Actually it was for a polio eradication campaign.

The money was raised through people paying to take a trim at his bushy eyebrows. They were so big, that before leaving the house he would actually brush them. Yeah, now that is some eyebrows.

Before the cutting I would have gave Guinness World Records a call.


The next story comes from that crazy state of New York. In Franklin Square, New York a man is accused of walking into a pet store and catching a $350 shark. But wait, it gets better. He then, put the shark under his coat and tried to walk out.

Now I wasn't there, but here is what I believe happened:

Man: "What should I do today? You know, I have always wanted a fish tank. But what would be cooler than a fish tank? A shark tank! Yeah, that's what I'll do!"

Grabbing his boots and his sweater, he heads for the door. Trekking down the street he nears the pet store. Upon entering he heads for the tanks.

Glancing around he finds his shark. Then he finds the price.

Man: "$350! That's insane. For a fish!"
Clerk: "That happens to be our finest shark."
Man: "But $350!"
Clerk: "He can swim. Do you want him or not?'
Man: "Ummm....not today. But thank you."
Clerk: "Have a good day sir."

And with that the clerk turns to help someone else. Now the man realizes that starting his tank was all he was going to do today. So he quickly comes up with a plan. He will simply snatch up the shark, stuff it under his coat and leave. Nobody will even notice.

He grabbed the shark, shoved it under his coat, and headed for the door.

Sadly, as he waved goodbye to the clerk he failed to realize that sharks are fish. There for, unlike if he had tried to steal a puppy, they need water to breath. So in air, they thrash and flail cause they are suffocating.

Not the best plan ever.

In the real story though, the police eventually tracked him down. How? He was a frequent patron to the pet store. At his house they found a green moray eel that he had bought for $300 a few weeks earlier. Using a stolen credit card!

Moral of the story kids is that don't steal fish. And don't have aquariums as hobbies. They are expensive and get you in trouble with the law.

Anyway it goes, that's it. Case Closed.