What to yell at the other team's goalie...

In case you're not sure how to heckle, here's some things you can pull out:

Tell him that his mom had to use a zoo MRI Machine.

Remind him that best case scenario, he's playing on the Versus Network right after the Rodeo Championships.

His airbrushed mask is pretty fembot.

Eastern Europe called, it wants its last name back. (Don't use this if the goalie has a last name like "Smith")

Make a Seinfeld reference.

Tell him he killed Ronald McDonald.

Ask him why he voted for McCain in the last election.

Tell him the general plot of "The Day the Earth Stood Still" ... that's enough to drive anyone to the edge of sanity.