March 28, 2009

Northwest forms of public transportation

In case you haven't noticed, you pretty much have to own a car to survive in the Northwest. No taking the subway anywhere like in New York. Luckily, if you're resourceful, you can use these other forms of public transportation.

1. Your buddy's car with him driving - Just tell him your car is in the shop.

2. Hanggliders - This is if you like heights and don't mind the occasional rough landing. Think about it though, you won't have to worry about sitting next to that strange guy who talks to himself on the bus.

3. Horses - We still use horses in the Northwest. In fact, I saw tumbleweeds the other day, HERDS of tumbleweeds. So basically we haven't progressed much since the 1800s. Ask Casey, he keeps walking around in a cowboy hat, chaps and boots - challenging people to a gun fight at the OK Corral. Luckily, most people just point and laugh.

4. Trains... not the passenger ones - Nothing wrong with hopping on freight trains and riding the rails. Just make sure you packed a lunch and make sure the train isn't headed to someplace like Montana.

5. Turning into a bat and flying places - Ask the people of Forks, WA about this, I hear they have a vampire problem.

6. Hiking - Who needs to go to the mall quickly when you can walk up and OVER a mountain. Just make sure it's not a Volcano.

7. Put a bunch of balloons on a lawn chair - This is actually called a Redneck Airline.

8. Use the Spokane International Airport - that doesn't have any international flights.

9. Sled dogs - If used properly not only can they be used as public transportation, but they can poop on your ex girlfriend's lawn.

10. Using this restroom.

1 comment:

  1. Silly Spokane airport - they think trips to Canada makes them an "international' airport. Someone needs to remind them Canada is not a real country.

    ReplyDelete