July 16, 2009

Since there are no sports on...

I'm writing this in a bunker somewhere in Spokane. Currently, the sports world has collapsed and the Boston Red Sox don't play until Friday...

You know what this means? I have nothing to live for. Wow. Perhaps I should invest in something like spiritual enlightenment, or own a puppy, or watch the WNBA.

For those of you that (rightfully) think I'm a black hole without sports - here are some other things that I like.

1. Child stars going on a rampage of sex, drugs and more drugs -
The more f-ed up the E! True Hollywood story, the more credit I give the person. Especially if some sort of animal is involved.

2. Pyramid Schemes -
Here's the deal, send me 10 bucks, get your friends to send me ten bucks and I'll send you two dollars back. It's a can't miss deal!

3. Katy Perry -
Do I really need to explain this?

4. Eric Andrews -

5. Star Trek: The Next Generation -
I watch reruns all the time and sometimes I put on a carburetor and pretend to be Geordi LaForge - you know, the guy from Reading Rainbow.

6. PBS -
Want to watch a British documentary on chicken legs! Here you go!

7. Being a man-whore -

8. Running ... a short distance -
I love my 400 yard jogs. They're quite relaxing.

9. Eating - Ask Casey, at the Sounders FC game -
I ate out Qwest Field. In fact, thanks to me, they shut down the "All You Can Eat" Buffet.

10. Pretending to be an interesting person -
The sweater vest is totally pulling it off too.

(Thanks to Boston Dirt Dogs for the photo)

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