Halloween is already upon us and I’m sure you’re already sick of seeing the “Zombie, because I think death is cool” and “Kitty Kat, because all I have to do is wear cat ears on my head” variety of costumes.
Luckily, sports provides a myriad of possible costume ideas, and since this column is just a week too late, you have an entire year to make it.
Ed Hochuli
Simply get a referee jersey, pad your shirt to give a bulky, strong-man appearance (apology to “that guy” who thinks he has guns for arms but they’re actually twigs) and then walk around with a whistle, inadvertently blowing it all the time.
Tri-City Americans fan
This requires a mullet wig, Ams jersey, mobile home, cut-off jeans, cowbells (a sure sign of an annoying fan) and no Memorial Cup Championship ring.
WSU or Washington Football fan
Very easy, just find a paper bag and put it over your head.
Clay Bennett
This might require you to go down to your local Halloween store and find a snake costume.
Shaun Alexander
You can just dust off that old “37” Seahawks jersey and fall down everytime it looks like somebody is going to get close to you.
Mariners General Manager
Just walk around in a suit throwing money at people that don’t look very talented when it comes to the game of baseball.
Michael Phelps
This might be a little tough; somehow get your hands on eight Olympic Medals from Beijing, wear them around your neck and make sure that you have ample time to squeeze your large buttocks into one of the swimming suits that are tighter than the Oakland Athletics front office.
Fred McGriff
Wear a baseball cap with an obscenely high crown, and keep endorsing Tom Emanski’s Defensive Drills Video.
Brandon Hansen: This one is simple as well. Get some orange hair-color spray, a Spokane Indians ballcap, a backpack with at least one camera, and Starbury sneakers.
ReplyDeleteJake Rehm: Dress like William Wallace wannabe, and you're set.