December 26, 2008

What I learned over the Holidays

During these past couple of days of joy and gift-giving, I've learned a couple of things...

- Learn the aisle right-away hierarchy in stores before you go Christmas shopping, otherwise you'll get t-boned. For some reason, shoppers would rather give their first child to a Chinese Slave Army as opposed to giving some space for you to squeeze into the electronics aisle.

- AMC's showing of John Wayne movies was a pure stroke of genius, and then I saw they're going to show Clint Eastwood movies on New Years. That means that roughly all of Americans will be watching, while the ones that don't are simply communists.

- I like people that sent me personalized "Merry Christmas Brandon!" text messages as oppose to the generic, mass-texted ones. However, the more I think about it, I didn't send out a Merry Christmas text so perhaps I'm the one that's an a-hole.

- Read this story about Kurt Warner. Awesome stuff. Right down to him learning how to "Walk it Out."

- Four large holiday meals within 48 hours is pretty much deadly. I was in a food coma where I had dreams about Super Mario Bros, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Montana fans stalking me, and a dream where I apparently gained the ability to shrink in size, making me perfect for re-enacting Adam Morrison's NBA career.

- Relatives never question how much you eat. In fact, I get called a "growing boy" ... awesome.

- People are actually kind of pissed about Gonzaga's loss to Portland State.

- Pumpkin Pie does not need whip cream. In fact, why the hell do you need the whip cream? It masks the flavor!

- College World Series re-runs on ESPN Classic... yep, I'm addicted to sports.

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