Things I've noticed about gyms

I went to workout at a gym last night for the first time since I developed a beer belly and boy, I'm apparently allergic to exercise.

At least though, I picked a pretty non-descript, non-big corporate gym, so it was a pretty laid back atmosphere. And it wasn't crowded so I didn't have to ask for Joe Sweaty to stop touching my bum.

However, there's something about the nature of gyms that constant throughout.

The loud guy grunting - I understand you're channeling your Chi, but you sound like you're giving birth to a Watermelon.

The guy texting on the bike - That's me! Let's just say I am an expect at the "low impact" workout. Maybe that's why I'm fat. At least I get my socializing done.

The fat person that always seems to be walking around the gym but not actually doing anything - And they've been there for like four hours. I don't get it. Wouldn't you spend your free time in a place that is a little less stinky.

Spray bottles - Nothing like someone fermenting the room with a wonderful aroma of rubbing alcohol.

Cut-off t-shirts - Say hello to the gun show, or in my case, the broken toy water pistol show.

iPods - I seriously do not know how people worked out before the advent of iPods. If mine had a dead battery, I probably wouldn't go work out. If it failed on me halfway through the workout, I'm packing things in.

Funny thing too, never drop your iPod on the treadmill, they tend to shoot backwards.

TVs - They're either showing Sportscenter or the O'Reilly Factor. Why the O'Reilly Factor? To make people feel better about themselves.

Hopefully my gym has a McDonalds in the back.