July 10, 2009

How to tell if you're whipped...

1. You have one of those two-seat bicycles that you and your girlfriend ride everywhere. Even to work. And she sits in the front seat.

2. During Monday Night Football, you're watching The Bachelorette.

3. You're friends think you went missing on Everest because they haven't seen you in three "cuddling night" cycles.

4. You don't dress yourself, nor do you buy your own clothes.

5. You sometimes have to pretend to be Edward from Twilight because your girlfriends wants you to on role playing night.

6. You haven't talked to another woman in four years.

7. You haven't watched an NFL game in five.

8. Your social circle consist of five other couples, and when you get to hang out with just the guys of those couples (usually when the girls are doing some facial or weight loss thingy) ... you all sit down to plot your escape.

9. You put the toilet seat down.

10. You've been forced to actually read the novelization of "Never Been Kissed."

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