October 21, 2009

You know winter is coming when...

1. Casey thinks twice about wearing his Speedo to the pool. For some reason he likes imitating 80-year olds and wears a Speedo even though nobody wants him to wear a Speedo because it scares small children.

2. When you wake up in the morning and look outside, it looks like "The Mist" or "Scary Creepy-arse Fog" or "This is what the Earth is going to look like in 50 years thanks to pollution." Seriously, Spokane turns into that creepy town from "Silient Hill" after October in the monring. Somebody should study this and make sure the town isn't built on some sort of Indian Burial Ground.

3. More Canadians start popping up everywhere.

4. Christmas decorations... in the store... everywhere. Wait until the music starts and you'll be freaking out like Bill O'Reilly taping a bad "Inside Edition" promo.

5. Blue. Balls. CRAP!

6. Even the Spokies are starting to dress up like the climbers who summited Everest. (On a side note: Do Spokies have some sort of special thick skin, because have you seen how cold it gets outside in Spokane AND these people are still out there. You'd think they could just find a foreclosed hourse or burn the falling dollar for heat.)

7. Ultimate Frisbee guy dissapears.

8. Drunk skier guy that brags about being a hill pro appears. Still unable to pick up women.

9. Malt Liquor becomes popular again. People just want to numb their senses and this glorified engine grease is the best way to do it.

10. Les Schwab employees start getting that "1,000 yard" stare because they're getting swamped with a rush not unlike the Isrealites leaving Egypt.

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