How to tell if you had an epic night

So you cant remember what happen the night before. You wake up and there's a pineapple on your nightstand and you have a hangover that feels like a midget is sitting on your head. Did you have a good night? Should you be worried the police will be coming to your doorstep to get their car back?

Here's some good signs that you had an epic night on the town.

1. There's a text conversation between you and your friend about how you don't think people appreciated your Dave Roberts slide from the 2004 ALCS impression on the dance floor.

2. You have shards of Christmas ornaments in your mouth.

3. You have a dart in your left shoulder.

4. There's a large collection of "Street Closed" signs in your apartment when you wake up.

5. Your computer was left on and the last webpage that was open was a travel service confrimation order for a plane ticket to Spain.

6. You wake up wearing a suit, and you didn't go out the night before in a suit.

If you experience any of those, congrats, you had an epic night. Hopefully you were safe and you now don't have a warrent out for your arrest.