February 11, 2010

Things that are as disappointing as Lindsey Vonn breaking her shin

Lindsey Vonn could have vaulted to Olympic greatness and turned every male between the age of 15-50 into puddy while watching her (I mean check out that SI cover!) go for gold. However, she broke her shin and now the hottest Olympic athlete this time around will not be competing. Crap, this is as disappointing as...

1. The final episode of Seinfeld - If you want to talk about going out with a wimper, this caused half of America to realize that the show wasn't that funny to begin with.

2. Snuggies - Sure, they sound like a good idea but then you put one on and realize you're about as cool looking as Friar Tuck.

3. Rex Ryan changing into a hockey jersey - Thanks ESPN for showing us Rex Ryan's gut on national television. We really needed that. Next time I'll guess we'll just have to resort to watching Jabba the Hutt in Return of the Jedi.

4. Toyota Brake Pedals -
Wait a minute, so what you're saying is that I can't stop in my new Toyota? Well that's kind of a downer...

5. The Economy -
And in other news, Casey and I will be peddling for cash tomorrow in downtown Seattle, be sure to stop by, say hello, give us money and perhaps clothing that doesn't smell like urine.

6. ESPN -
When they started to break out the "Terrel-Owens Cam" during SportsCenter, something told me that the network had jumped the shark. That was then followed by Craig James being allowed to make Texas Tech personnel decisions and we've got ourselves a true-to-heart suck-fest.

7. The Who during the Super Bowl -
I was trying to give them the benefit of the doubt but when my parents were going "what the hell were those guys doing on stage?!" ... that's not a good sign for the NFL which is trying to market to half-time show towards people my parents age.

8. The Indianapolis Colts -
Ask Casey, he's still trying to figure out what to do with his custom Colts "Super Bowl Champs shirt" that has a vomit stain on it from when Peyton Manning threw the game-ending interception.

9. This winter -
Excuse me as I get a tan while blogging. I have fair skin.

10. The New Jersey Nets -
There are more inches of snow on the ground in New Jersey then victories of this sad, sad NBA franchise. There are also more inches of snow than fans in the stands for this sad, sad NBA franchise.

Okay now if you'll excuse me, I have to go cry about the Winter Olympics that could have been.

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