How to know if the restaurant you're at is cheap

Apparently IHOP has started to charge 50 cents for a cup of water, signaling the downfall of human civilization.

Here are more signs that the restaurant you're eating at is cheap as hell.

1. That napkin dispenser requires a quarter before you can use them.

2. Your french toast is served on the table without a plate. That's an extra two dollars for the handling fee.

3. You can choose between the "vermin" and "cockroach" section.

4. Your french toast looks strangely like a bunch of McDonalds fries with syrup on it.

5. The menus are actually scribbled drawings on napkins.

6. The only special is the prime rib for your first born.

7. You have to tip the waitress by putting a dollar bill in her thong.

8. The restrooms are spotless because they know you'll be using it after the meal.

9. If it's your birthday, instead of singing you a song, they charge you double.

10. Adam Morrison is working there.