November 27, 2010

What Kyle Brotzman should do...

Poor Kyle Brotzman, he was the Boise State kicker that missed two field goals last night against Nevada and dashed the Bronco's hopes at a shot at the national championship. They were chip shots too. On national television. Against Boise State's biggest opponent of the year.

Ouch.

Something tells me that the Meridan, Id. native will not be very celebrated despite being a very consistent kicker before last night. Here's what he should probably do...

1. Have his parents move

Remember Ray Finkle's parents house in Ace Venture Pet Detective? Something tells me they don't have homeowners insurance for that stuff.

2. Move in with Bill Buckner.

Buckner lives in Idaho and he knows Brotzman's pain.

3. Blame his poor kicking on the bad economy

... and request a bailout from the government. Everybody is doing it!

4. Switch to soccer

He's already got the not scoring goals down.

5. Change his name to Jerry Brotzman and try out for punter

When has the punter ever missed two field goals?

6. Transfer to Florida State

They love kickers that miss field goals.

7. Sell the rights to his inevitable mental breakdown to Warner Bros.

Kyle Brotzman was a college field goal kicker when something went horribly wrong, now he's ready to see Gotham burn in the latest Batman installment. Beware of The Choker!

4 comments:

  1. He missed 'em wide left, right? That's what I heard (didn't watch it, gave up at 10-0).

    So he can be a conservative speaker, talking about the dangers of going too far to the left of anything.

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  2. Awesome man! Just awesome!

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