Advice Shaq will have for Lebron

1. If it itches, you'd better get it checked by a doctor.

2. When you beat the Lakers in the Finals, ask Kobe how your championship and crown-wearing a-- tastes.

3. Make a movie about being a genie, it will be a hit.

4. Here's the thing about the Orlando Magic - you're more likely to find somebody who has ridden "Pirates of the Caribbean" 20 times in a row than somebody that's been to every Magic home game last season.

5. When it doubt, say your name and add "Daddy" after it.

6. If you're a teammate with Mark Madsen, don't let him go out on the dance floor when you guys are out on the town.

7. When you refer to the Cavaliers, just call them "Voltron." You'll gain instant kudo points right there. When's the last time MJ made a 80s cartoon reference? And Space Jam doesn't count.

8.You know if you really wanted to, you could probably just play all the home games like Phil Jackson.

9. Land of the Lost... terrible movie.

Me Shaq. Me get mad. Me like to run.

Shaq is back in the West. Yet, there are many sceptics that question wheather he will be a good fit in Phoenix. Shaq does not like people who say he won't fit in on the Suns. These comments make Shaq mad. So mad in fact, that he is quoted as saying, "I'm very upset. You just don't want to get me really upset. When I'm upset, I'm known to do certain things- like win championships."

Wait, hold on a minute Mr. Shaq. Did you just say that when you get mad you win? I don't want to be the Debby Downer, but how do you win, when you're sitting on the bench?

Other skeptics have said that he won't fit in because of the fast paced run style the Sun have. To them Shaq said, "People assume I can't run. I love you run."

Again, sorry to inturrupt you Mr. Shaq. But when was the last time you actually ran? And not after the ice cream truck. Yeah, that's what I thought.

Anyway, enough picking on Shaq. He is still a good player and will probably make an impact on the Suns. But seriously, NBA players switch teams faster than kids hyped up on sugar run around the fairgrounds.

National Boring Association