The Germans are pretty good

With my dad's side of the family being German, my parents said I should go for Germany in the World Cup. I'm not 100 percent sure about that after that whole starting two world wars thing but I mean that was like seventy years ago right?

Oh and Germany is freakin' good at soccer.

CAPE TOWN, South Africa – No trash talking needed. Germany was just too good for Argentina.

Miroslav Klose scored twice to move into a tie for second on the all-time World Cup scoring list, and Thomas Mueller and Arne Friedrich added goals to give Germany a resounding 4-0 victory Saturday in the World Cup quarterfinals. As flashbulbs popped, the Germans hugged and high-fived each other before walking around the edge of the field, saluting their fans.

See, I feel like that if I root for Germany I'll go too far. Like...

1. Making a Panzer tank out of cardboard and walking around the stadium giving squadron orders.
2. Start punching other fans and quoting Indiana Jones... "no ticket!"
3. Would the bad guy theme song from Indiana Jones be way too much to play during a game?
4. Start making nicknames for players like "The Red Baron" and "Rommel"
5. Too bad Italy isn't still in the World Cup, I could remind them when their empire got invaded by Germanic tribes... yeah, take that Romans.

Yep, rooting for Germany seems like a terrible idea.

World Cup Live Game Blog

Alright, I am pumped for this World Cup match-up against Ghana. So pumped, in fact, that I'm going to do a live game blog. Follow along! (Keep in mind that times aren't Pacific Time but rather Mountain Time since I have moved)

Click here for the live game blog.

Soccer juggling dude

With the World Cup currently going on I figured we'd share an awesome video with futbol in it.

North Korea may send soccer team to coal mines after losing

You lose in World Cup? You work in coal mines for the rest of your life!

The North Koreans beat a hasty retreat to the team hotel after their 7-0 gubbing at the hands of Portugal on Monday. However, when they find out what mental leader Kim Jong-Il could have in store for them once their World Cup dream is over, they'll probably be taking the short journey back home verrry slowly indeed.

Despite winning round skeptical fans with a spirited performance against Brazil (and still having a chance to pick up their first points of the tournament against Ivory Coast tomorrow), one former North Korean coach is claiming when the players get home they'll be given new occupations. Shoveling coal for the rest of their lives.

Boob-tastic German tabloid Bild reports Moon Ki-Nam, a former Korea DPR senior coach who fled the country and defected to South Korea in 2004, reckons the beaten players' future lies down a dark hole with only a canary and memories of ‘that night in Johannesburg' for company.

Gosh North Korea, way to play into the stereotype as a ruthless communist regime. Although, I can't say enough how much stories like these give the world of sports so much more fodder to talk about. Love it.

The NK being a bunch of buttheads, not the coal-mining part.

Morning coffee... June 18, 2010

Down 2-0 at halftime to Slovenia in the World Cup, the US battled back to get a tie and keep its hopes to advance to the next round alive.

I also heard via text that the US scored another goal but it was called offsides, something the replays show wasn't the case. Is it me or are refs getting worse and worse? Or perhaps replays are getting better and better?

College News

Montana State head football coach Rob Ash expects a breakthrough this year
And having nearly bit my nails off watching EWU play MSU year after year, I fully expect this to happen. By the way, remember when MSU was screwed out of a playoff berth after beating the Griz, having the same record and yet EWU and UM got the bids to the playoffs?

National News

Missing North Korean players show up a practice
Is North Korea not one of the most entertaining countries in the World Cup? I think we need more communist countries in this international events.

LA bursts out into riots after Lakers win NBA Championship
Because what would a championship be without a good riot.

Ron Artest gives the best post-game interview ever
No really, watch this video and try not to laugh, I dare you.

What loss to Brazil?

So lets say that North Korea loses 2-1 to Brazil. Nothing really to fret about, Brazil is one of the world's best soccer countries ever. North Korea is North Korea. However, if you read the game recap from the Korean New Service, they don't even report the final score.

Pyongyang, June 16 (KCNA) -- The league match of the 2010 World Cup between the DPRK and Brazil took place at dawn (Pyongyang time) on Wednesday.

From the outset of the match the two teams fought a seesaw battle. The DPRK footballers created good shooting chances, not losing their confidence even after losing two goals.

At about the 88th minute of the match Jong Tae Se headed the ball before passing it to Ji Yun Nam who powerfully kicked it into the rival's goalmouth, scoring a goal.

The DPRK team will meet its Portuguese rival on June 21.

What would happen if they did this for Detroit Lions games or season recaps. "The team played with heart and tenacity and even though they dropped sixteen games, they finished the season on a high note."

Classy. Another reason not to live in North Korea... crappy SportsCenter segments.

Don't promote beer at the World Cup...

Reasons to watch the World Cup? Weird stories like this...

Thirty-six female fans were ejected from Holland's World Cup match against Denmark and interrogated for hours for allegedly wearing orange dresses to illegally promote Bavaria beer, though there's no branding on the dress and the company denies hiring them.

Could they do this sort of thing during a NASCAR event if anyone is promoting beer? Is it possible to detain thousands of fans?

World Cup, 1986

Sorry just had to post this because I find it so funny. Those two are "fighting." The guy on the right is British, the guy on the left is from Argentina. Wonders of wonders, the two teams were playing one another at Aztec Stadium in Mexico City.

I think the internet just got its new viral photo. Enjoy.

Sad day at the World Cup

It's only a day old, but the 2010 World Cup already has a downer story to talk about.

JOHANNESBURG (AP)—It should have been a moment of triumph—Nelson Mandela, basking in the cheers as Africa’s first World Cup opened. Nelson Mandela with his great-granddaughter Zenani, who was killed in a car accident following Thursday's kickoff concert. (AP Photo/Peter Morey)

Instead, South Africa’s beloved anti-apartheid icon stayed at home with his family Friday in northern Johannesburg during the opening ceremony and game, mourning his 13-year-old great-granddaughter Zenani, who died in a car crash on the way home from a tournament-eve concert in Soweto.

The Nelson Mandela Foundation said the tragedy “made it inappropriate” for the former president, who is 91, to attend the opening ceremony in Johannesburg.
That's a shame considering how much Nelson Mandela represents to South Africa and how this should be one of his finest moments. Prayers go out to him, and the good things that people say about this man are too hard to count. Sad day.

Boo England!

So the United States will be taking on England in the first round of World Cup games, meaning we'll have to deal with some of the most passionate soccer fans in the world. Here is how you get into their head...

- Remind them that the NFL still makes more money than the English Premiere League. Also mention that unlike the EPL, there are women football fans.
- Remind them that they live in England.
- Remind them than even though we don't have universal healthcare over here, we still have better teach.
- Oh and our food is better.
- Say "lets play a game, raise your hand if you've won a revolutionary war."
- Tell them that their biggest contribution to the musical world was the Spice Girls.
- Braveheart. Yeah, you guys are a bunch of dicks. Oh, and William Wallace owned you.
- Inform them that they created Canada. Yeah thanks for that.
- America has NASCAR. England has Mini-Coopers. I think we win.
- Tell them France is better. That will go over well.

FIFA 2010 Vuvuzela

Yesterday I showed you about the Vuvuzela.

Now you can buy the official FIFA 2010 World Cup Vuvuzela.

Vuvuzela

If you've ever watched soccer on a national stage, then you've heard those extremely loud horns being blown during the matches.

Those horns are actually called a Vuvuzela and are from South Africa. Here's a great piece explaining more about the horn.

NOTE: Best part of the video is his description about the small horns.

The World Cup is already off to a great start

South Africa may have some issues. Namely security issues. Like an entire football team getting robbed before the World Cup even starts. Uh-oh.

Local press are reporting the Colombian national football team, in town to play out their 2-1 friendly defeat to South Africa on Thursday, had £1,900 worth of cash stolen from their suitcases — a DAY after turning up to the Hyde Park Southern Sun hotel, in northern Johannesburg.

The five-star resort is set to be home to the Slovenian World Cup squad, who are arriving, bum bags padlocked shut, on June 8.

Two female employees have already been arrested and charged, after a pair of "scantily clad" women were spotted on CCTV skulking around corridors prior to the robbery.

Punters robbed by half-naked workers in their bedrooms? There's a name for those sort of ‘hotels.'

Somehow I think this is going to be a made-for-TV Fox movie. And I will watch it. Scarves up!

Sex is OK at the World Cup

We were worried for the sexual health of World Cup soccer players for a moment.

Argentina's World Cup doctor says the squad will be allowed to sleep with "regular partners...without champagne or other drinks" during the tournament since sex is "not a problem in itself." 

Oh and they'll have hella nice toilets. Got to get rid of the condoms somewhere.

Meanwhile, in case you haven't heard Casey is getting married meaning that sleeping with regular partners without champagne or other drinks is probably going to be frowned upon. No Illegal. Frowned upon. Like masturbating on an airplane.

United States in good position for the World Cup

UPDATE: The United States will take on England on June 12 in their World Cup opener. This is the first time the two have faced off since 1950 when the Americans upset the British 1-0. That's not the first time they upset them, anyone remember the Revolutionary War and the War of 1812? Yeah we owned them.

One of the most exciting days in soccer has happened, the World Cup 2010 Draw and the United States looks like it got a pretty nice pool of teams to play against. The World Cup starts with pool play, with the top two teams in their respective group advancing to the second round or "knockout" round of play. Here's what it looks like for the US.

GROUP C 

England - No. 9
United States - No. 14
Algeria - No. 28
Slovenia - No. 33

The US lost in a friendly match to England 2-0 in 2008 but you can't take a whole lot from that. Also factor in that England tends to choke sometimes and with the improved play of America lately, you've got to think that maybe the US has a shot. Either way they should be able to defeat Algeria and Slovenia meaning that they would advance to the knockout round.

The main thing is they avoided a "Group of Death" which basically means two highly ranked teams in the same group. That's very good.

If they don't advance... that would just be disappointing.

Things America should do instead of playing World of Warcraft

1. Learn to play soccer so we can actually beat somebody when the World Cup comes around. I'm tired of quaking in my boots when we face Trinidad.

2. Discover some way how we can connect all those exercise machines to power plants and generate electricity. Think about it, America would get thinner and become less dependent on oil.

3. Watch hockey again.

4. Read a little and grasp a basic understanding of the english language so we can stop having "Hotzeechicka23045" log online and say things like "Thatz my girel!" and "Ima hot stuf!"

5. Spend more time perfecting that MySpace shot that shows juuust enough cleavage.

6. Spokie mentoring. Every spokie needs a mentor. Where else are they going to get their drugs?

7. Finally realize that Magic Johnson is the worst tv personality ever.

8. Cribbage anyone?

9. Tell somebody is the US government that all those workers they pay for road construction are taking a little TOO long of coffee breaks. In fact, they actually made you hold the stop sign for a few minutes while they got some joe.

10. Make fun of Tony Romo's ghetto booty.